Update FORTY FOUR!? I’m closing in on a whole year of weekly updates.

When I set out to do these updates, my mission was to welcome 800 members into the Creative Dream Circle this year.? I started these weekly updates to share the process of holding the dream strong enough and long enough that it comes to life.

That’s not what happened.? Some would call this whole thing a failure.

I’ve just passed 200 members in the Circle and given the way I’m approaching this at this time I don’t see a way to get to 800 by the end of the year.

Though I do feel that if I still really wanted to hit 800 this year, I could do it.? I’ve learned so much about business this year and am feeling more confident than ever.

But the fact remains that I’m not going to hit my original goal.? And that’s good!

What happened instead is that I learned more about what I really want.? Which is what happens when you grow dreams from the inside out, which is exactly what I teach in the Creative Dream Circle so it would be ridiculous for me to be approaching my dreams differently than how I teach people to do it!

When you’re aligning with heart, soul and purpose (which is a MUCH bigger job than you think – most of us are (unconsciously) very strongly aligned with our limiting beliefs which we take as fact) a new story emerges.

My new story is that I’m not as ambitious as I thought.? When I read blogs written by people who DO want to work with thousands of people, who LOVE having that huge business, who see BIGGER as the only way to grow – I don’t feel anything.

I don’t feel inspired.

I don’t feel a tinge of jealousy that they have something I don’t (which would mean that of course I want what they have).

I don’t feel all high and mighty that they’ve sold out and I’m a better person for not being so ambitious (which would mean that I do want they have but I am not willing to admit it to myself).

I’m happy that they’re happy, that’s all.? There’s none of my stuff tangled up in it because that’s not my story.

Then there are other people out there with really unique and gorgeous in-depth coaching programs and when I look at what they’re doing – I feel inspired.

Because one big thing I learned this year is that I’m not as finished with one-on-one coaching as I thought I was (having 800 members in the Circle would mean not doing any more one-on-one work).

I am deeply inspired to create a whole new super in-depth coaching program, and am working on it right now.? It will plug into what happens in the Creative Dream Circle and go deeper for the people who want to go deeper.

I am also inspired to do more group intuitive healing calls with the Circle which I will be doing next year.

Dreaming of having 800 members this year was not a mistake.? It led me to knowing more clearly what I actually want.? I want to make that super duper clear because this happens with dreams all the time and too many people feel like failures as a result.

Pursuing your dreams out of alignment with your heart and soul WILL bring you to what is right for you. Along the way you usually do have to let go of your original vision and settle into what is really true for you.

The more graceful and awake you can be about this process the better as your inner critics will want to insist that you are a failure and they’ll drag this evidence along towards any other dreams you choose to pursue.? Do not underestimate how good the inner critic is at the art of IMPOSSIBILITY.

So this week I’ve been focusing on getting to know my Dream Self? better (this is the me who lives my dream) and getting clear on what I need to do to grow into this version of myself (for Circle members: this is in module 6 of the Creative Dream Incubator e-course).? This is a DreamSelf collage I made:

As I explore my Dream Self I’m learning a lot about what I want to do next and how I want to do it.

I’m making more time for art.? I’m working on my new coaching program. I’m taking lots of bike rides.? And I’m re-filling the well which is still running low, after creating The Mandala Class and moving the Creative Dream Circle to a new site this month.

Oh! The Mandala Class!? It’s going soooo much better than I’d even hoped.

Circle members are doing the most amazing mandalas, full of transformation and wisdom and healing.? Every day I pop in to see what’s been posted and I’m blown away by their stories.

So grateful to be doing this.