This week The Mandala Class started inside the Creative Dream Circle and I didn?t get anywhere near as many new sign-ups as I had hoped for.

This happens sometimes.? A small part of me felt sad but most of me was just really happy about sharing this amazing class with all the people who have already signed up.

And as soon as people started posting photos of the mandalas they were drawing and the amazing insights they were gleaning from the process I stopped caring about who didn?t sign up and was busy cheering on the people who did.

When your dream and your business collide there are certain considerations to be made.

Because the path to a dream never goes in a straight line and there are always gifts in getting what you didn’t want but at the same time I need to pay the mortgage and buy groceries, Moleskines and glitter paints.

What I have found is that the best way to approach it is to see it all as an experiment and be light with it.? When you really NEEEEED something to go well and make x dollars that puts so much pressure on that everything tenses up and it gets easy for things to go sideways.

I have built my business slowly. ?And in that time I have discovered things that work for me, so if I hit a financial speed bump I feel confident that I have the tools to boost sales to get over it.

But I?m also always trying new things, following my inspiration about what I want to put out there and how I want to put it out there.? Often I am surprised? things I think won?t work so well actually work very well, and things I am sure will work well just don?t.

The lighter you can be with all of this, the more resilient you?ll be and the more likely you?ll stay in the game long enough to build a stable foundation.

And of course sometimes you just can?t afford to be light with your finances.

When I was in my 20s and trying to make a living with my art I was always hovering on the edge of financial ruin. ?While I was committed to exploring my creative gifts and learning how to make a living with them, the whole thing really was stressful and eventually I did ?give up? and get a job.

(The story from how I went from starving artist to working in a cubicle to being financially secure enough to comfortably leave my job to be a full time artist, plus tools to do the same yourself, is in The Creative With Money Kit, which is one of the classes you get in the Creative Dream Circle.)

It turned out that ?giving up? and getting a job was not giving up at all – it was the perfect move to make to build a sturdier foundation for my dreams.

So now I?ve set my financial life up to be simple and easy so I can be light with this and approach my business with an attitude of experimentation.

So, I didn?t meet my sales goal this week and that?s ok.

I did learn something really important – which always happens when you take ?failure? lightly and are willing to explore it to find the gifts in it.

I was inundated with people who wanted to sign up for The Mandala Class, but not join the Creative Dream Circle.? That’s why my sales were so low.

But the truth is, I want to work with people who are committed to creating positive change in their lives, and to bringing amazing things to life. ?These people know that it?s a journey and it takes time.

I don?t want to work with people who just want to take one class.? But my marketing plan for this year relied mostly on promoting individual classes as I added them to the Circle.

See? ?Disconnect.

These kinds of disconnects happen all the time when you are actively living with and pursuing your dreams, because you?re always growing and your dreams are always growing and so things shift and change and disconnect.

I had been braining storming what I want to do with the Circle for next year, and was already leaning towards a shift and this shows me that I am really on the right track with my new ideas.

So, as a result of not meeting my sales goal this week I?m feeling more inspired and sure than ever about what I?m doing next. ?So YAY for not meeting my goal. ?Onward and upward.

Coming back to the Creative Dream Check-In Questions:

My dream is shifting a lot right now, so it?s good to keep track of it in this way.

My dream is: To keep growing the Circle at a steady pace and to do my best to serve the members in bringing amazing things to life.

I want it because: Purpose. Fulfillment.

When I have it I will feel: Hmm, I feel like I do have it because I am doing this right now. ?It feels like spaciousness, peace, alignment and fulfillment. ?I like it.

But dreams are about guiding us into the next stage. ?So what is my next dream?

Oh, my secret project. ?I don?t want to share any details yet because it is likely to change a lot as I work on it.

I see secret project working really well with the Creative Dream Circle. ?This is how I want to grow and evolve and share my gifts next.

I want it because: I feel like something lights up in my heart when I think about it.

When I have it I will feel: Like I am serving from a place of deeper purpose. ?It feels bigger and more solid. ?I feel excited to move into this.

So that?s the new dream. ?I am writing this part of the update on Tuesday morning because I wanted to write this story while it was fresh, so this gives me my focus for the week: Secret Project.

What happened in the last week?

Oh my, after writing the update to this point on Tuesday morning it feels like all hell broke lose.

I wrote a post about Creating Space To Grow Into Who You Are Becoming As You Move Towards Your Dream.? So I’ve been doing a lot of that messy vulnerably stuff.

I cut my long hair short.? In intuition started to scream at me on Wednesday afternoon to chop it all off, so I stopped at a hairdresser that I ride past on my bike ride and sure enough – they could take me right away.

I feel like I left a whole lot of things I don’t need anymore behind, tangled up in that big pile of purple hair lying on the floor.

It’s been a super roller-coastery week.? Super super happy and sure.? Self-doubt and sadness.? A great big mess in the Dream Loft as I sort through it all.? All the usual stuff of personal and creative growth.

How do I feel about this?? Right now I am bubbling with enthusiasm about what comes next.? Like I still have preparations and packing to do but I am so ready for this journey.

I actually feel TALLER.? This is something that has happened before when I’ve been in a bit of an inner-growth spurt.? I like it.? It gives me a new perspective and makes bigger dreams feel more me-sized.

What do I need now?? To be gentle with myself and the process.? To not rush.? To pay attention to how I’m feeling and follow my intuition.? To remember that everything is possible for me.?

What does my dream need now?? My dream is smiling sweetly at me from the top of a mountain. ? It’s happy I’m making the journey and waiting for me to get there.? It’s not time yet for us to be together, I have to first grow into the me who can carry this dream, before we can journey together.

Taking all of this into account, my next mission is:?

Keep meeting with this dream and getting to know it while focusing most of my time and energy on supporting the new qualities that want to emerge in me and my life.

The part of this that is challenging is that I want to dive into the Secret Project but I really do need to focus on this inner work first but I get so impatient.