I was looking for self love affirmation music on Spotify and selected a random song.

I'm settling in, all comfy in my bed, relaxing my body.... and suddenly I’m being told that only people who love themselves fully can be of benefit to the world.

Like, what the actual fuck?

While there is SO MUCH GOOD in the new age, holistic wellness/wellbeing, personal growth industries.... there are also these incredibly damaging beliefs.

We need to have real discernment about how we engage with it.

You don't have to love yourself before you are worthy.

You were born worthy.

And loving yourself, after growing up in the world as it is right now, IS TRICKY. If it's hard for you - that's because of what happened to you and how it impacted you. It's NOT a measure of your value!!!!

ANYTHING that is hard for you IS NOT YOUR FAULT.

This is a really good perspective to go into ALL of your healing work with.

We all have our challenges, and our challenges have a lot to teach us. But we are not "less than" because of them. So much of the new age/holistic wellness/coaching/personal growth industries use this harmful rhetoric, sometimes in subtle ways that we don't always notice.

Be aware of where you, or others, blame or shame you for your circumstances.

A lot of it just ignorance. A person who hasn't done any work to unpack their own privileges will judge anyone who didn't have the same privileges.

It's also about the individualist approach. The idea that the individual is the answer to everything, and the cause of everything - which also comes out of pure ignorance about the impact of the systems we live in.

You do better in your healing when you're not shaming yourself.

No one else really understands what you've overcome to be where you are now.

Be proud of yourself.

And keep going.

 

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