This was my practice this morning: painting my feelings.
I have a lot to say about this process of space-making. I was writing about it all weekend.
But today, that's not what's in me to share.
Today I want to share that I woke up anxious.
And so I made myself a latte and a green smoothie (well it came out red because I added a few slices of beetroot) and sat with my feelings and this is what came out.
I found the light. I followed it to a place where I was able to soften my body and mind, and offer myself some advice about slowing down and being more present with myself
A lot of people feel anxious right now.
I didn't have an issue with anxiety before the pandemic. I have one now.
Lots of people don't feel anxious but to worry or feel stressed or are just overwhelmed.
This is where we're at, collectively and yet a lot of people are feeling alone in it. I want you to know that you are not alone.
And the world is asking us to carry on as though this is not where we're at.
A space-making practice is a way to rebel against that.
It's actually a way to create a better world, both your own personal world and the larger world that we share.
Space-making helps us find the softness in the hard places. And those soft places do tend to come with dreams attached. Ideas for new things we want to create or new ways we want to be or experiences we want to have. The softness shows us the way.
The first step is to honour how you're feeling.
Give yourself the grace of making space to be where you are.
How do you feel right now? Where is that feeling in your body? Anywhere else? What's the story running through your mind?
Is there any light to be found? What might help this all soften? What do you need right now?
Tomorrow - Monday, April 18 at 10 am Central - I will be on Instagram live for Creative Genus Planning Sessions for this week.
If you go to this Instagram post on your mobile device you can set up a reminder to join us live, or catch the replay on my page later.
We'll do a short feel-good meditation for starting the week and a discussion about navigating your next steps.
This week I want to talk a bit about those times when you have no clue what to do next.
These are not times to stop!! These are actually times of transformation.
I have a lot to share about this and I know it will be a great discussion.
The last few weeks I've been working more closely with the people in Dream Book who feel ready to give up.
With everything that's happening it's like why even bother?
But beneath that "why bother?" story are a LOT of complex layers of feelings.
And giving up is real fuel for our inner critics and their "See? I told you you shouldn't have tried. Of course you failed" stories.
Giving up is not your only option.
People are FEELING LIKE giving up is the only option because they don't have the capacity to work on their dreams in the same way they could 2 years ago.
And when you're overwhelmed it's easy to not notice that THERE ARE OTHER WAYS. You don't have to choose between doing things that feel impossible and giving up completely.
These times call for new ways of engaging with ourselves, our creative projects, and our biggest dreams for who we want to be and what we want to create.
We can approach Creative Dreaming as a HEALING practice.
We can approach Creative Dreaming as a SELF CARE practice.
We can approach Creative Dreaming as a SPACE-MAKING practice.
I have been writing all weekend.
For the last two years, my writing time has been really stiffled because I don't have the mental clarity + capacity to write like I used to.
This weekend, it's kind of back because I am SO inspired by looking at all of the places where people tell me they get stuck, and creating new ways through.
The places where we get stuck are opportunities for growth.
I have a free healing circle called The Hard Parts Are Where The Magic Happens where I show you exactly what I mean by this.
And this approach that I have been teaching for a long time has worked for a long time... But right now, with all the stress in the world, more and more people are just not able to get into it.
So as I have been working with those people more closely, I am seeing ways to add more gentleness, slowness, self care and magic to make the work DO-ABLE even when you feel absolutely flattened.
And as I did that I realised.... oh wow these are the practices I have been doing too!
I have been doing them seperate from Dream Book, but as I look back (hindsight is 20/20!) I see that this is the work that helped me, over the pandemic, continue to engage with the deeper dream-building work in Dream Book.
So I am creating two new options for Dream Book:
One is for when you are completely overwhelmed. The focus is healing, self care and space-making. Instead of giving up, you can focus on healing and self care as forms of MAKING SPACE for your dream.
One is for when you are ready to take your next steps with your dreams, but you've got a busy life or you're going through stuff, so you have limited time and attention for this work. You don't have to put your dream aside completely to take care of yourself.
And the original Dream Book will be called the "I am ready to BLAST OFF!" version for when you DO have the time and energy to dive deep into your next-level dream-making. This pace is ideal for wellness practitioners, healers, coaches and guides. But if you're new to this work and have a LOT of time and energy to devote and want to dive right into the deep end, this is also a good place to start.
It doesn't matter where you are are.
Your dream is always here to help you heal and grow.
To give yourself what you need now AND move yourself towards where you want to be.
I hope to see you tomorrow on the Instagram live.
Yesterday I made a new video about Dream Book and how we've been navigating everything since 2020.
The goal has NOT been to make sure everyone "stays on track" with their dreams and goals! Though anyone who has wanted to do that has been supported in that.
For most people though, the goals and dreams have changed, figuring out how to navigate the pandemic, physically and emotionally, suddenly became a priority.
But the tools stayed the same. The work stayed the same: Meeting yourself where you are and moving towards where you want to be.
It's just that there's a lot more overwhelm, exhaustion and heaviness to work through these days.
And I gotta say - NOT working through it feels like a really bad option. These last two years have been traumatizing, and doing nothing to process all of your feelings means they are going to be impacting you for a very long time.
Unprocessed feelings DO dull our dreams and our whole lives.
Lately, with where we are now, it's all gotten heavier, so I am shifting gears a little.
For the people who can engage with it - Dream Book remains a program that will help you build the path to your dream, handle all of the inner work of facing the places where you hold back, even all the stuff that's in your blind spots that you don't know about, and then help you GROW into the version of yourself that can navigate that path that leads to where you want to be.
But not everyone can engage with all of that right now and that is completely understandable.
For the people who can't engage with it because that's just too much - we're focusing on SPACE-MAKING.
I'm creating the new Space-Making program - though "program" is maybe the wrong word as this will be in VERY small doses so it can be done when you have NO capacity, because it can help increase capacity and make space from where you are. I guess "support system" is a better description.
And while I am creating that, I am inviting ALL Dream Book members to email me, let me know where you're at, and I'll help you come up with some tools/practices/support that are immediately helpful for your self care and help you shift towards where you want to be.
This is NOT a time to give up.
I have been working with a few people who had given up and are coming back to it and have all of the impacts of giving up to work through now.
Giving up on your dreams doesn't make everything else easier. It doesn't sooth overwhelm or bring lightness to the heaviness of the world.
What it does is add some new heavy layers of feelings. For some it's shame, grief, sadness, disappointment, that "see I knew you'd fail" kind of thing.
It's ALSO not the time to carry on as you had been.
Obviously.
I don't think anyone has that kind of energy and mental clarity right now.
But those are NOT your only options. This is actually an ideal time for CHANGE.
WHAT IF you were working on your dreams as a healing practice?
WHAT IF you were working on your dreams as a self care practice?
WHAT IF there was no pressure or timelines or perfectionism?
WHAT IF this was a way of bringing JOY into your life, right here right now, while also setting your future self up for MORE joy?
This is what our dreams have always been asking of us.
This is what Dream Book has been encouraging you to do all along. Your dream is here to HEAL you, GROW you, and bring you the JOY of being who you really are.
But you know that "how you do anything is how you do everything" thing? We bring a lot of shitty patterns into how we approach our dreams.
We can stop doing that.
In fact, not like I like to should anyone, but I think we SHOULD stop doing that.
There is a much better way.
So here is that video:
And here is Dream Book. Send me an email when you join and we'll work out your unique way of getting into all of this.
I had such a great meeting this morning with my dream and the soul of my business.
I had this jumble of ideas and wishes in my mind and they showed me how to put them into a mindmap that answered all of my questions.
And from the mindmap I created a list.
And know I know exactly what I want to do, and exactly how I want to start doing it.
So. I know exactly what I want to do and exactly how I want to start doing it....
And then this feeling comes over me.
I try to push it aside and keep going. There is more I can add to the list, or I can start doing the things on the list...
And then I find myself scrolling social media!
I bring myself back to the list.
And that feeling comes back. It's uncomfortable and I'd like to just push it aside...
But that's not how it works.
Feel all of the feelings that come up for you on the path to your dream.
This is one of the eight principles we work with in Dream Book. If you are following all of the principles, you can't stay stuck. If you are doing the opposite of the principles, you're likely to be quite stuck.
I had to admit at this point I almost switched back to Facebook. But I am Staying. With. It.
OK - this feeling that comes over me when I look at this list.
So - it's a part of my process and I need to be with it.
So. Hello there, uncomfortable looming feeling.
"I'm sorry, I don't mean to LOOM" it's like a tiny version of me, and she's holding some really big thing... it's kind of vague but almost like a huge tube, like 3X her height as the diameter and she's trying to drag it somewhere.
Hey, let's put that down. I take the tube and gently set it down. I pick her up and sit her on the tube so now we're at eye level to each other.
What's up?
"Well, this is just all A LOT. I mean you have a very big list here and I agree this is a list of wonderful things and it would be wonderful to actually DO them all but also I have to say, I mean I'm sorry, I know this gets SO uncomfortable here, but the thing is, I have to say it...
I don't think you're going to DO all of this. I think you're going to start strong and this will become one more abandoned thing. Oh! Ouch! I'm sorry! I said it! I know it pains you."
Two things happened for me here:
I realised that yes there was very much a part of me feeling afraid that I Wouldn't DO all of these things.
And I realised that this was a little silly because I complete LOTS OF THINGS. And then I don't complete projects - it's because I got what I need from them already, or because something else feels more important. It's fine.
And in a WHOOSH I felt fine with not completing every project and could stay in this conversation holding that perspective.
Well actually, that vague looming discomfort probably pains me more, because it derails me completely and has me distracting myself instead of doing what I truly want to do. So I'd rather face the harder stuff head on and work through it.
"That's? Good?" She really seems to not want to upset me.
Yeah, that's good. I think I may be stronger than you think. Like a LOT stronger. Like I CAN handle having feelings.
"Oh? What?" She is completely befuddled.
Yeah, I actually would rather feel my feelings than avoid them, because this way I am FREE. Freedom is really important to me. I need to feel free enough to do what I want to do - like all the things on this list. NOT feeling my feelings keeps me a prisoner to them.
"Holy crap, I never thought of it that way" Now she's grown a little taller and heavier and so her weight is pushing down on the tube she's sitting on, keeping us at eye level. She leans over. "This is fascinating"
So, it seems like you are a part of me who hasn't been paying attention for the last, like, 20 years. Maybe you are my 28 year old inner "child"?
"25"
Oh, yeah ok that makes sense. So here's the thing: feeling those uncomfortable feelings that loom over me helps me actually MAKE SPACE to actually DO the things I want to do and actually has helped me not be so stuck in general. Feeling feelings is really good! Like I even go to therapy just to talk about my feelings because I love it. I pay for therapy, I love it that much.
"Oh wow"
Yeah, it is really cool. Listen, I want you to see how much I have overcome, the things you struggled with - I do not struggle with. Yes, I have other things going on and the world is a fucking disaster right now but YOU GREW AND HEALED.
She kind of gasped, to look at me and really see where I am/we are.
So I don't need you to be trying to do anything for me. I'm not sure what it is you were trying to do with this tube?
"It's a pipe. Like a pipeline." Now she is fully the same size as me, just sitting beside me with the pipeline beside her.
What were you trying to do with this?
"Trying to make a pipeline to take these uncomfortable feelings away from you."
Ahhh. Yeah. That's exactly what you do that makes things harder for you.
She gets up and kicks the pipeline and it disappears.
She gets it.
And I feel... ready to go do these things.
After a week in bed sick with Covid, I woke up this morning ✨feeling good✨
I still have some symptoms and will need to keep resting but I feel ⚡️alive⚡️again!
I even had an honest to goodness EPIPHANY in my Dream Book this morning. I had a thing I was working on, which was feeling very complicated and I didn’t know how to handle it and suddenly I saw how to turn the PROBLEM into an ALLY and know I feel EXCTED to work with this former-problem-now-ally.
It's not that I feel like I NEED to get back to work. (In fact I will very much be easing SLOWLY back into work and doing a lot of resting for a while)
It's that working/playing/exploring with my dreams makes me feel more ME. More inspired. More alive.
Please DO NOT give up on your dreams.
I know, Covid or not, everyone is overwhelmed and right now can feel like the worst time to pursue something new.
But listening to what's calling you, following what feels MOST INSPIRING AND ALIVE right now always leads to more aliveness and joy and healing and growth - all the things we need most right now.
For a lot of people I work with, dreams are rapidly changing right now because WE are rapidly changing right now.
So I am seeing less " I want to scale my business to 6 figures as quickly as possible" and more "I want to REST and PLAY more while also making the money I want to make"
We're all dreaming of more self care and gentleness and feeling good.
The problem is that we judge the SHIT out of our dreams.
We ESPECIALLY judge the dreams that are not all about outer-world accomplishments and things that can be measured.
So - can you NOT do that?
Can you listen to what's calling you and do your best to answer?
PS: I hope you'll join me tomorrow on Instagram Live for a discussion with my friend Chris Zydel about navigating this transformational time. Go to this post from your mobile device to see the time in your time zone, and set up a reminder notification.
I've got Covid last week and I'm pretty sick so there won't be a live Monday meditation + planning today.
Instead, I recommend:
- Last week's meditation + discussion on creative dreaming in a dystopia
- The week before we did one on filling up on good energy for the week
- The 15 minute Creative Genius Planning video for planning your week from your most wise, brave + creative self (that's the one I listen to every week while I do my planning)
This Thursday I'm doing a special discussion with my dear friend Chris Zydel about change, healing + creating a new world.
Please join us! It will be live on Instagram at 1 pm Central on Thursday, March 31.
Go to my Instagram account from your mobile device to set up a notification to get a reminder to join us.
You can't look outside of you for hope.
I mean - there's so little hope to be found out there right now that it's depressing to try.
But mostly because - we're here to BRING IT.
Hope and light and creativity and new possibilities.
This is your work.
This is the theme for today's Creative Genius Planing Session - on Instagram Live.
How do we be force for positive change while the world is a dystopian nightmare?
If you are on this planet right now you have a role to play in creating a good future for everyone.
And if you have a business - your business can play a role as well.
Join me, let's explore this together.
Monday Morning Meditation (AKA Creative Genius Planning) is happening at 10 am Central, on Instagram live.
If you go to my Instagram account from your mobile device you'll be able to set a reminder, and also see this in your own time zone.
And you can catch the replay on my page after we're done.
(These live public meditations are only on Instagram, but I will be doing a more in-depth free class on Zoom soon - stay tuned for details)
I've been having this conversation with a lot of the creative helper people, light-shiners and way-showers.
How do we keep showing up for our work, while the world is falling apart?
And for people who are not self employed it's still a difficult question.
How do we be force for positive change while the world is a dystopian nightmare?
If you are on this planet right now you have a role to play in creating a good future for everyone. And if you have a business - your business can play a role as well.
This will be the theme of the Monday Morning meditation next week!
Join me, let's explore this together.
Monday Morning Meditation (AKA Creative Genius Planning) is happening at 10 am Central, on Instagram live.
If you go to my Instagram account from your mobile device you'll be able to set a reminder, and also see this in your own time zone.
You can also check out the replay from this week's Monday Morning meditation here. The theme was filling up on good energy and fuel for your dreams, which included a great conversation about taking good care of ourselves.
And if you're feeling so flattened by everything that you can't even think about this, I have 2 free courses that help:
Angel Sullivan and I had ✨the most✨ amazing talk about holding a positive vision for the future while the world is falling apart.
This is especially for artists, teachers, therapists, coaches, healers, etc - the people who are offering inspiration and support, which really is tricky when the world keep becoming more and more chaotic AND ALSO this work is needed now, more than ever.
So many in the new age/wellness are turning towards total spiritual bypass - just look at the positive, turn off the "mainstream news", and "know" that everything that is happening is happening for the positive transformation of the world.
There are two things I want to highlight:
1. If all you do is focus on your own corner, lifting up yourself and those like you - you are unconsciously leaning into your privilege and any solutions you generate are only going to be for you, and people who are as privileged as you are.
WE CANNOT CHANGE THE WORLD WITHOUT INTERSECTIONALITY. All we can do is keep re-creating the systems of oppression that we already live in. It's time to do better.
2. YOU HAVE THE POWER TO HELP CHANGE THE WORLD. We all do. It's going to take everyone. It's really easy to feel like you are too small to change anything. But stay present with everything - because you ARE too small to change anything BY YOURSELF but together, we can do this.
It's almost an hour long, so make a fresh cuppa and watch it here.
FIRST: Join me tomorrow for Monday morning meditation as a way of making space for:
✨ the good things that want to find you
✨ sorting out your next steps for the good things you want to create
This is happening at 10am (Central) on Instagram live -go to my account to to set a reminder to join us (the notification feature only works from a mobile device) or catch the replay after and meditate in your own time.
I know that some people think it's nuts to keep offering courses at this time.
AND I know that my work has never been more needed.
We can't just get lost in despair or distract ourselves away from the things that matter or pretend that are are fine where we are while our hearts ache more something else.
We are here, on earth, at this time, with everything that is happening, for a reason.
It's natural to have self doubt and uncertainty and all of that... but it's VITAL that you work through it, step into your power, and create what you are here to create.
And I am here to help you do that.
I know your dreams are possible and I am here to help you GET them.
So: Creative With Money is happening March 15 - this Tuesday, at 1:00 pm Central.
This is one of my most beloved classes, and is definitely needed right now.
There will be ah-hahs and shifts and the glowing sense of feeling more free inside your life.
This is for creative entrepreneurs AND people with no interest in having their own business. It's about your relationship to money, which is also about your relationship to: abundance in general, trusting yourself, what what kind of life you deserve to have.
The vibe is: YOUR CREATIVE GENIUS IS BIGGER THAN ALL OF THE OBSTACLES - EVEN CAPITALISM.
The class is: alchemy meditation for marinating in the magic of trusting your creative genius, journaling for capturing the ah-hah moments coaching and healing for working through the sticky places and finding more FREEDOM and SPACE to create more of what you want in your life.
This is included in your Dream Book membership for March.