Hi resistance. I feel so lost today.
Resistance is a little sleepy and confused (like me, actually). You’re reaching out to me about this?
Well I’m not sure who else to reach out to?
I mean - your wisest self, bravest self, most energized self, most creative self… there are lots of yous who are equipped to help with this. I’m an interesting choice.
Yeah. But you’re who came to mind, so - I feel lost today. What do you think?
Is LOST really the best description? If BEING WITH helps us MOVE THROUGH and staying vague and not present is a way to make everything harder… which are you doing when you say you’re lost?
The second one. More specifically I feel anxious, and tired, and spacey, and like why bother doing anything anyway when everything is so hard?
What’s hard?
Silence.
Because I saw you getting ready for the day. Picking out clothes, packing your stuff for the coffee shop, excited about your projects. I see your life, and how things are actually going really well for you. So what’s hard?
I just feel like I’m in quicksand this morning.
Which is what resistance feels like.
Yup. This feels so convoluted because I feel like I am me, and you are my resistance - only I’m the one in resistance? But this is what I mean about how I feel today. Everything is all screwed up. I can’t even talk to my own self without it being all convoluted.
Oh honey. She gives me a hug and I start to cry. Your feelings are valid, you know. Everything I said about things going well, that’s all true, and it doesn’t mean you won’t have a lot of uncomfortable feelings anyway.
Yeah. Ugh. Now my back is hurting, I hate this chair.
Resistance rubs my back.
OK obviously I miss having a really affectionate partner. I don’t get hugs and backrubs and this sucks.
Yes, sweetie, that sucks.
Ok acknowledging that feels better. It feels so tangly because I also don’t want a partner right now.
Yeah for sure! So where are you at now?
I guess the work I want to do feels HEAVY and BIG and I feel weak and small in comparison. Oh I guess heavy is the wrong word. It feels out of reach.
And isn't this exactly what you help people do? Do the things that feel out of reach?
Yeah.
So what are the tools you would suggest for this situation?
Oh wow, resistance is going to make me take my own medicine.
OK here are the tools I would suggest:
Making your trust in your dream bigger than your fears.
Dream Lab to ask the dream what you should do today.
Alchemy Process for working with overwhelm
Alchemy process for getting answers from your dream
Alchemy process for acclimating to your dream
I mean there are more actually but any of these would work. Though of course we should mention the video for when you’re in resistance.
"So what are you going to do?" Resistance asks.
Alchemy process for getting answers from your dream
My question is: I want to feel energized and creative and I want to be doing things! You know a huge part of my dream right now is simply acting on all of this inspiration but my progress is soooo sloooooow. How do I get there?
All of my anxiety and tangled feelings are here with me in the meditation. Feels good to include them and not try pretend to be somewhere I’m not.
The field of creative dream alchemy feels like spring. A meadow full of flowers, soft light. My mood shifts so much through the grounding and connecting parts.
My dream shows up as a blue bird. Like a cartoon super bright blue birds. Oh there are a whole bunch of them! Maybe I’m Snow White? They fly around me. But as they do, they are guiding me out of the meadow, onto a path in the woods.
The birds are flying and moving. In circles often, but also they are getting somewhere. In the part of the meditation where I talk about how the dream shows up in the meditation I get it - my dream is showing me to JUST GET MOVING.
Laying in the field of flowers is great and important and we should do it every day AND ALSO let’s get on the path and get moving, let’s do that every day too.
I have to pause the meditation often, to be with my own experience without my voice in my ears.
I give my question to the birds and they can’t quite hold it. It’s too heavy. There is this struggle and it’s like - I can’t be fully connected to my dream AND be in this question.
The question starts to lighten up and I look more closely and see some bees are there, pouring honey on it.
It’s getting sweeter and lighter.
Now the birds can carry it. And they put it at the top of a very tall tree.
And I get this whole new idea: A notebook of SELF CARE PROTOCOLS.
Like: if I wake up feeling lost: this is what I do.
When I feel anxious: this is what I do.
Etc.
I mean, I have had SO MANY versions of this so many times in my life.
I need a new one for where I am now.
I sit with this and realize - I am still operating on some pre-pandemic protocols. The thing where getting up and GETTING MOVING helps me get into the mindset I want/need to be in for my work. My pre-pandemic self almost always had the ability to get myself moving no matter how lost or heavy I felt on any given morning.
What if I be sweet to myself, and recognize that who I am today today doesn’t have that ability?
Like sure, do that when I can because it works for me!
But on the days when I can’t - what’s the protocol then? I need clear plans or else my mood takes over planning my day and that will never go well.
I’ve been sitting with this question and only one idea is coming to me: make art. Make myself a latte, and a smoothie or whatever food I feel like, put on comfy clothes, get my art box and big sketchbook journal, put on soothing music, lay on the floor and make art. Express my feelings.
OK this feels embarrassing.
I mean - this is nothing I don’t already know about myself.
BUT/AND
Some days we can’t access the things we know.
Some days we can’t be our “best selves”.
And since I am in the process of planning calls for 2024 - I am going to do one on creating self care protocols for those times when you are not at your best.
Update: I added that call to the library!
I added 4 new calls this week:
Feb 15: Exploring Resistance and Creative Flow
March 12: Taking Inner Work Deeper
April 9: Letting Your Dream Come To You Instead of Chasing After It
May 15: Creating Self Care Protocols That Help You Be The Version Of You Who Can Do Your Dream
Dream Book members:
Come to the forum to share your thoughts or start a conversation about whatever you're working with.
Get your next Dream Book lesson or get a weekly journaling + alchemy kit.
Go the Library of Creative Dream Alchemy to find a practice that fits for where you are or use the Dream Lab if you're not sure where to start.
Check out the calendar of upcoming calls. Make a plan to join us live or catch a replay.
In the fall, when everything in my life felt so hard, I was looking forward to winter.
I love winter anyway, but this year I was really craving the quiet and stillness of it.
The magic of sleeping in a bit and still being able to walk to the coffee shop during the sunrise.
The spaciousness of early sunsets and quiet evenings at home.
And how magic and spaciousness are so healing for me.
Last night I was lying in bed, and my furnace kicked on.
My heart actually exploded in gratitude. I wanted to cry. I was so amazed and grateful that I have my own furnace. It’s only job is to keep me warm.
I felt so loved and safe.
Just from having a furnace. The same furnace I’ve been glad to have, but mostly taken for granted for years.
And I thought about how much I love everything about my home, not just the furnace, how I am not taking it for granted. Something about going through a divorce has me more present with all of the things I love about my life.
There is magic in a breakup because there is healing in a breakup.
And as long as I stay present with my feelings, not denying the hard parts but also not wallowing in them - I get to have all of this magic, too.
My life feels bigger. I feel bigger. Possibility feels bigger.
And it’s so wild to me since I didn’t choose this divorce. But I feel healed and freed by it, too.
And I want to add - in therapy we’ve been looking at all the ways I did contribute to the divorce, not a blaming way, I don’t want to blame or or blame him, just in a way that comes back to this truth: what is best for one is best for both.
AND this is all a part of creative dreaming.
I'm been committed to having my inner truth guide my actions, and so - if I am doing my best with that, then I need to accept the outcomes as they happen.
The path doesn’t look the way we think it will. This is true for most dreams.
I am thinking about how often our creative dreams do fall apart, just like marriages, and how this is all a part of it.
If nothing ever falls apart, there is no space for anything new!
I wrote this a few weeks ago, but now I see how it fits with my work right now of creating a container for my dreams to grow, and how I MAKE SPACE for them.
Dream Book members: there is a mini-class on For When Your Dream Falls Apart.
Dream Book members:
Come to the forum to share your thoughts or start a conversation about whatever you're working with.
Get your next Dream Book lesson or get a weekly journaling + alchemy kit.
Go the Library of Creative Dream Alchemy to find a practice that fits for where you are or use the Dream Lab if you're not sure where to start.
Check out the calendar of upcoming calls. Make a plan to join us live or catch a replay.
(Dream Book members: get your next journaling kit, with alchemy meditations here)
This week’s journaling + alchemy kit gave me this: I make space for miracles.
I actually made mugs, notebooks + zipper pouches with this on them, and I use this mug every day.
This is my mantra.
And yet, it was really hard for me to feel this one, this week.
The start of last week felt like a slog with no miracles in sight. I felt like I didn’t want to MAKE SPACE for miracles, I didn’t want to be the one doing that work, I wanted the miracles to find me.
Which is valid!
AND it’s not usually how miracles work.
By the end of the week I realised two things:
- The way I am planning my weeks and setting goals isn’t working for me. AND I have an idea for what would work!!! It’s like, I noticed exactly what is missing for me (which is a tiny miracle!). So I am going to try that for this week and this feels so exciting to me.
- I’m not actually MAKING SPACE for what I want. I have this specific dream I am working on, but I have no container for supporting it.
I am still figuring out what that second one means.
But this is something that comes up from time to time in Dream Book - how are you making space for your dream in your life? There are a LOT of ways to do this and what I am feeling right now is that HAVING A CONTAINER for it feels important.
The work of MAKING SPACE is so varied.
Sometimes we are literally too busy for our dream to fit in our lives. Sometimes we have to give other things up in order to have it. Sometimes we just need to notice the ways it’s growing, like a houseplant that is growing, but crowded by other plants, maybe you just need to move it a little.
When I say I need a container for my dream to grow in - I have no idea what this means. Is it a literal container? Like a file box to keep things in? Is it a practice, a way of showing up for it every day and noticing?
It feels like a journaling process. That’s all I know.
So I am making a page for it in Dream Book - the page is a proxy for the container for supporting the growth of my dream. And I’ll just sit with it regularly and see what comes next.
This is a big part of creative dreaming. Being willing to sit with things that you can’t see or understand yet.
This is how we make space to operate from a new level of consciousness.
Which is what making space for miracles is all about.
Dream Book members:
Come to the forum to share your thoughts or start a conversation about whatever you're working with.
Get your next Dream Book lesson or get a weekly journaling + alchemy kit.
Go the Library of Creative Dream Alchemy to find a practice that fits for where you are or use the Dream Lab if you're not sure where to start.
Check out the calendar of upcoming calls. Make a plan to join us live or catch a replay.
Note: This is a post about my daily practice with my Creative Dreams - I often link to the tools, courses and processes I use which are available to Dream Book members. If you're not a member, find out more + join us here.
On Fridays I do my Dream Status Report which is a series of prompts I use every week to help me have more clarity, momentum and groundedness on my path. You can do them with me (Dream Book members: come post yours in the forum!)!
My Dream Status Report for this week:
PART ONE:
My dream is: This one doesn't want to be shared, but I do have a very specific thing I am working on now.
I want it because: I am excited about it! And it feels supportive of all the other things I want - like having this puts me in a position for all sorts of new dreams.
When I have it I will feel: Free - and I feel free now but it feels like I would feel more free somehow. And more secure/safe and relaxed.
PART TWO:
Invite the soul of your dream in (using the Dream Lab practice) to help you with the rest of the prompts.
OK wow. When I tried to do this I was just bombarded with distractions, everyone I know suddenly had to call or text me, lol.
So, I keep trying. And it's actually hard to connect with my dream today and I realize... oh there are just so many feelings in the way. I'm just tender today AND I had a lot of things I wanted to get done today and this is not a good combination. So I just sit with this. All of the tenderness in my heart and all of the wishes that I felt more... sturdy and focused, I guess.
My dream feels like a faraway soft warm light. Inviting me towards it and understanding that I am where I am today.
PART THREE:
Last week’s focus was:Remember the magic. Keep doing the worthiness + receptivity daily practice.
What happened in the last week?
The worthiness + receptivity daily practice is from what we did in the worthiness and receptivity calls we did last year, I am doing just a quick version of getting into that feeling. This week I made printables from both of those calls and added them so you can download them - underneath the call replay. The printable is a way of tracking your practice with this over time.
The dream I am working with now is starting to feel more and more inevitable. I love this.
Apart from that, this week was a little rough mental health wise. I stopped going out for long walks as much when the cold hit late last week and that has such a HUGE impact. I went for a long walk yesterday and it changed everything so I need to keep it up. I do have all the layers I need to do this, I just need the motivation to put them all on, lol. But remember how much better I feel after I do this (even if I'm not that into it while it's happening!) is good motivation.
I am SO happy and proud of my new ways of organizing my thoughts and ideas into my projects. I have so many "journal ideas" for little printable kits and guided journals, and things to add to Dream Book. I structure this all much better, between keeping lists in my project management app and then also having documents ready in Procreate (the app I use for drawing in my iPad) with all of my notes in them. This way I can pick it up and JUST DRAW without having to "figure out where I am". This feels like a miracle.
Recently we did the Structure, Habits Routines call. Plus there is the Creative Planning + Project Management class in the Dream Plan Kit and the Creative Genius Planning Sessions. There really isn't one way to structure your ideas in a way that will help you implement them. This can be ongoing work - especially as your circumstances change throughout life!
What am I learning/How do I feel about this?
Ever since the pandemic started I've been foggy brained. The overwhelm makes sense, with peri-menopause on top. And perhaps long Covid? My brain is not the same. So it's been SUCH A GIFT to finally start to get my ideas organized in a way that feels right for where I am now.
What do I need now?
A bit more discipline about going for the long walks. It helps to plan in advance. When I am ore disciplined about getting fresh air and exercise, then I am also naturally more disciplined about doing the things I want to do. The exercise fuels my creative projects.
What does my dream need now?
That far-away light glows brighter. It wants me to remember it is closer than I think.
Taking all of this into account, my focus for the next week is:
Keep doing the worthiness + receptivity daily practice. Be more disciplined about fresh air + exercise. These super boring self care things make the magic happen!
Dream Book members:
Come to the forum to share your Dream Status Report or start a conversation about whatever you're working with.
Get your next Dream Book lesson.
Check out the calendar of upcoming calls.
This is where I keep stumbling:
I am forgetting the magic of little steps.
I know this is kind of funny given how often I write about it. And how I am ALWAYS coaching others to look for smaller steps. And then smaller still.
But here I am, discounting my own little steps.
I think this is a part of the nature of being creative: we see the big picture. I can see how I want it to be and so each little step really is unsatisfying… if I stay focused on the bigger picture.
So here are so tiny steps I took:
- I got my paints out from the bottom of my closet and put them in front of my bookshelf, to I could start working on that mural in my workspace.
- I pulled that bookshelf out to make some room to get back there and paint.
- I brought a chair upstairs to stand on to paint.
With these three things done, each as separate steps at separate times, at one point I just… started painting!!!!
It’s easy to see “paint one little bit” as a little step, but it took three other steps to get there. And it would have take more steps if all of my paint stuff for this project hadn’t already been together in one box in my closet.
What I want to work on is having an attitude that CELEBRATES and HONOURS the tiniest little steps.
I don’t want to wait until I see new paint on the wall to acknowledge that I am DOING IT.
AND
I wrote this a week ago.
In the week since, I have done VERY LITTLE on the mural. For various and very valid reasons.
But that doesn't discount the success of those steps I took last week.
And it doesn’t change the fact that I am still set up to take more little steps.
This attitude of CELEBRATING and HONOURING the tiniest little steps that I want to have is a part of CHERISHING THE PROCESS.
Our whole culture tells us that the outcome is the only thing that matters. And that a story, like the one I shared above, is only inspirational if it ends up that I completed the mural in record time.
The truth about creativity and human nature and life under colonialist capitalism is that it doesn’t usually work that way, and having a goal of wanting it to work that way for you gets in the way of ACTUAL PROGRESS.
So what’s the tiniest step you can see to take?
And can you make it even smaller?
And then can you celebrate yourself for taking it, even when it doesn’t get you all of the way to where you want to be? Can you celebrate the direction you’re going in instead of focusing on the speed?
Dream Book members:
Come to the forum to share your thoughts or start a conversation about whatever you're working with.
Get your next Dream Book lesson or get a weekly journaling + alchemy kit.
Go the Library of Creative Dream Alchemy to find a practice that fits for where you are or use the Dream Lab if you're not sure where to start.
Check out the calendar of upcoming calls. Make a plan to join us live or catch a replay.
I’m still thinking about how I show up here and how I want to show up here.
I love how I show up on classes and calls, but the ways I share my work outside of those circles often feels fraught.
Working with dreams is intensely vulnerable. Most dreams never even get named because most people find it too vulnerable to even get close. This is one of the ways dominant culture fails us, by not holding space for vulnerability.
This is why I’ve always shared my thoughts, stories and feelings online the way I do.
This is why I share my stumblings as much as my successes. I probably share them more because I want all of us to see them as no big deal.
Failure IS a tool for building your dreams. If you can’t use it, you can’t build anything.
And personally we all get upset when we fail - for good reason.
But then culturally we’ve created this space where it’s not at all safe to fail. Which ricochets back to our own personal relationships with failure, heightening all of the already difficult feelings.
So I share my little stories as a way of chipping away at that. This feels important to me but it’s not always comfortable!!!
I’m living proof that you can be vulnerable and survive.
Not that I am saying you need to be vulnerable in public like I do!
But you do need to be able to tell yourself the truth about what you want, and what’s in the way, and all of the feelings that get sparked in all of that.
And I know it can feel safer to avoid all of that… but thoughts and feeling that we avoid don’t actually go away.
So - what parts are you avoiding today?
And what teeny tiny little baby step can you take with that?
Dream Book members:
Come to the forum to share your thoughts or start a conversation about whatever you're working with.
Get your next Dream Book lesson or get a weekly journaling + alchemy kit.
Go the Library of Creative Dream Alchemy to find a practice that fits for where you are or use the Dream Lab if you're not sure where to start.
Check out the calendar of upcoming calls. Make a plan to join us live or catch a replay.
We're starting a whole new year.
There's a lot happening in the world.
There's a lot happening in our lives.
The Hello 2024 Dream Blessing Ceremony is happening on January 18, so we can come together and create this space to receive clarity, to marinate in inspiration and possibility.
To bless our path ahead in 2024.
I am so excited for this!
Four reasons why we need a Dream Blessing Ceremony:
- Dreams come with obstacles! Obstacles spark doubt! A blessing helps connect us with our deepest inner truth which is always 100% on board with our creative dreams.
- Bringing creative dreams into this world is difficult + vulnerable work! It helps SO MUCH to be in a circle with others who affirm the value of your dream. And sometimes it’s easier to affirm other people’s inherent right to dream, which we naturally do in these circles (even on the replays!) but as we feel excitement and enthusiasm and validation for other people’s dreams, those feelings naturally boomerang back to us.
- New creative dreams can be so vague and foggy and hard to see clearly. A blessing helps affirm and clarity them.
- January isn’t necessarily a good time for setting goals! You’re either at the height of summer of the dead on winter, both of which I really love, but aren’t necessarily great times for setting a lot of new goals. Our calendar and and our colonialist capitalist culture are at odds with our human nature, so it’s also true that it’s the new year! And it can feel so good to go into a new year with a vision for what you want to do with it. A Dream Blessing ceremony gives you space and support for making this work easier.
As always, there will be space for ALL feelings on this Zoom.
No forced positivity! We’ll honour and validate every person as they are, where they are. Being lost, angry, confused, stuck and scared are valid parts of the path and we can learn as much from them as we can learn from our inspiration and highest callings.
Hope to see you there!
Dream Book members: get the call details here
Everyone else: Check out Dream Book and join us here
Dream Book members:
Come to the forum to share your thoughts or start a conversation about whatever you're working with.
Get your next Dream Book lesson or get a weekly journaling + alchemy kit.
Go the Library of Creative Dream Alchemy to find a practice that fits for where you are or use the Dream Lab if you're not sure where to start.
Check out the calendar of upcoming calls. Make a plan to join us live or catch a replay.
(Dream Book members: get your next journaling kit, with alchemy meditations here)
This is the mantra I got in this week’s Dream Book journaling kit and I am NOT feeling it.
I woke up groggy, foggy, heavy and sad. Having a TOTAL MONDAY.
I went back to sleep and my poor cat Bear had to wake me at 7:17 when his breakfast was 17 minutes late.
I fed him and kind of moped around. VERY VERY SLOWLY got dressed, thought about my day, and thought… I think I should just call in sick today. Get into sweatpants. Watch Netflix.
It was a real battle this morning to get anywhere near feeling powerful enough to get close to my dreams.
This is just how it is some days.
I didn’t battle it by forcing myself to do anything I didn’t want to, or pretending to feel differently than I felt.
I sat in my bed and cried. I didn’t understand why today felt so hard, I just offered myself some comfort and feeling your feelings is comforting.
Then I meditated.
And I thought about what I had planned for the day: A sunrise walk to the coffee shop - I had missed sunrise at this point but I could still walk in the sunshine. I had a list of things I wanted to do there, plus coffee! And a treat! And then a 30 minute walk back home, and the way doing 60 minutes of walking in the morning makes the rest of the day feel better.
Then I took out the garbage. Like a trial run. And outside felt GOOD. So I came back in, bundled up, and went to the coffee shop where I am writing this.
I am powerful and have what I need to make my dreams real.
I am at my MOST powerful when I’m accepting myself where I am.
Dream Book members:
Come to the forum to share your thoughts or start a conversation about whatever you're working with.
Get your next Dream Book lesson or get a weekly journaling + alchemy kit.
Go the Library of Creative Dream Alchemy to find a practice that fits for where you are or use the Dream Lab if you're not sure where to start.
Check out the calendar of upcoming calls. Make a plan to join us live or catch a replay.
Note: This is a post about my daily practice with my Creative Dreams - I often link to the tools, courses and processes I use which are available to Dream Book members. If you're not a member, find out more + join us here.
On Fridays I do my Dream Status Report which is a series of prompts I use every week to help me have more clarity, momentum and groundedness on my path. You can do them with me (Dream Book members: come post yours in the forum!)!
My Dream Status Report for this week:
PART ONE:
My dream is: This one doesn't want to be shared, but I do have a very specific thing I am working on now.
I want it because: I am excited about it! And it feels supportive of all the other things I want - like having this puts me in a position for all sorts of new dreams.
When I have it I will feel: Free - and I feel free now but it feels like I would feel more free somehow. And more secure/safe.
PART TWO:
Invite the soul of your dream in (using the Dream Lab practice) to help you with the rest of the prompts.
My dream shows up as a typewriter with wings. It's dark shiny blue.
Oh LOL. This week my laptop died suddenly, and I got a new one. I've used Apple computers for almost 30 years and I've always liked them, until my old one. That one was an absolute lemon and I didn't like using it. I was going to replace it this year, but it just happened more suddenly than I thought it would. And I am SO HAPPY with the new one, which is midnight blue, and an absolute joy to use.
It feels like - feeling FREE and SUPPORTED to express myself. Having my words fly out to the people they are for. And the whole thing feeling magical.
I mean YES this is what I want. It feels heartwarming to meet the soul of my dream in this way.
I ask it to help me with the rest of the prompts and it's happy to help.
PART THREE:
Last week’s focus was: Settling into the new year.
What happened in the last week?
The new computer feels HUGE.
I never liked the old one, for many reasons but especially the keyboard just felt wrong. This new keyboard feels SO GOOD to type on.
When I went to pick it up, on the way back in I checked the mail and this moth ring (in the photo) had arrived, which I had been waiting for for almost 6 weeks!
When I took off my wedding ring it felt so strange. I am not a jewelry person, but I loved that ring and was used to wearing it so it's been weird to not be wearing it. So I decided to look for a new ring - not a fancy one but something that represents this new phase of my life. I searched "witch ring" and found this on etsy. (I don't like the feel of the adjustable band on the back, but I plan to crochet over it with very thin cord.)
I love the moth with the moon on my finger and seeing my hand on the dark blue keyboard has witchy vibes that I LOVE. I feel like THIS IS THE NEW ME. This is who I am stepping into in this new phase of my life.
So this week, I stepped into it. Last week and this week, I have been taking consistent steps around getting my work planned/organized in ways that support me in doing what I want to do - HOW I want to do it. I am so happy with how this is going.
And winter finally arrived! Like, winter weather and a lot of snow. This FEELS RIGHT. I have been wanting that winter feeling, and our winter was so mild until now. Of course I was enjoying long walks in the not-so-cold (comparatively) but something about winter really being here feels like a relief. Time to WINTER. Drop leaves, sink inward.
AND I've been doing a mini practice - feeling worthy of and receptive to my dream - for 5 minutes every morning before I get out of bed. This is from what we did in the worthiness and receptivity calls, just a quick version of getting into that feeling and it really makes the day so much better!
What am I learning/How do I feel about this?
I keep coming back to the magic of taking whatever tiny little step you can. And to keep taking them. And how you do eventually get to places where it all comes together.
I feel... every feeling, lol!
What do I need now?
I'm doing all of the things to support my mental health and creative flow and make progress on my goals. I need to keep taking the little steps.
What does my dream need now?
The typewriter with wings GLOWS. It wants me to remember the magic.
Taking all of this into account, my focus for the next week is:
Remember the magic. Keep doing the worthiness + receptivity daily practice.
Dream Book members:
Come to the forum to share your Dream Status Report or start a conversation about whatever you're working with.
Get your next Dream Book lesson.
Check out the calendar of upcoming calls.
I started using the weekly journaling kits for STRUCTURE but it’s also giving me some vibes (each week has a different quality and mantra) and some different ways to consider how I am working with my dreams (each week has a journaling prompt about that).
I forgot how MAGIC these kits are when you spend time with them every week because they are a way of making space for insights to emerge.
So this is the insight I had this week:
I have struggled with staying on track with certain goals because I am coming at them from a place of DETERMINATION.
What if I came at it from LOVE?
When I am fueled by determination, I can show up for a while but it gets so tiring. And then it gets boring. And then I wonder… do I REALLY even want this? And I definitely do want it, but I don’t like the process and eventually I stop showing up.
And “‘determination” really is plugged into self-improvement 🤮 and all the says dominant culture encourages us to accomplish external things in order to be proven worthy, instead of validating that fact that each of us is inherently worthy.
This is a part of a bigger shift I am in.
Brought on by so many things.. my age, peri-menopause, the way the world is changing as late-stage capitalism starts to fail, things I am learning about my self after 30 years of working on self discovery… I am in-plugging from so many “learned” ways of being to embrace my most authentic ways of being.
This is what I’ve been doing for 30 years already!!! So I’ve made loads of progress and it can feel so frustrating to see the places where I have work to do.
AND some of the places where I am still plugged in are starting to feel SO FUCKING UNCOMFORTABLE and it feels URGENT that I do something about it.
So. This clue - being fueled by love instead of determination - feels so important.
And it’s funny because people in Dream Book are always telling me how much they appreciate my approach which is SO MUCH driven by love and soul, especially compared to other approaches out there.
But there is a next level and it’s time to look for it.
How do I LOVE MYSELF and LOVE MY FUTURE enough to stay on track with these goals?
Which is not a question to answer right away. It‘s a question to sit with over time. To be with all of my different responses and reactions to it.
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