I appreciate my resistance today

By Andrea Schroeder / March 19, 2024 / daily practice, healing, inner work, journaling, resistance project

It feels rich and transformative.

I’m still resisting it.

But sitting here, beside it, feels full of possibility.

I drew it out in my journal: me beside this spiral pool.

I sat with it, wondering why I wasn’t just diving in.

And I noticed more about it. The pool itself is a rainbow - not bright colours but an oil slick kind of rainbow, iridescent with possibility.

And I knew if I dived in, everything I want would be in there.

And then I drew that out… the pool above, rays of light streaming down, trees, flowers, soft grass to sit on and another pool. This one is the pool of healing and dreams come true.

And still, I am not diving in.

Sitting here beside it feels right. I’m acclimating and integrating.

I don’t think acclimating and integrating get enough credit.

(After I wrote this, we ended up having a RICH discussion about acclimating and integration on the March New Moon call)

These are powerful tools, and so many people skip by them, wanting to rush the process.

But without them, you can’t really HOLD ON to your dreams.

Acclimating and integrating is where you get grounded.

I’m appreciating how far I’ve come, to hit this new wave of resistance.

I’m appreciating how CLEAR I feel about my next steps and how brave my plan is. And of course a BRAVE PLAN is going to stir things up which is going to bring on the resistance.

And today I’m just letting it be here. Appreciating resistance as a partner in the journey. Appreciating that working WITH my resistance will bring me healing and new possibilities.

Dream Book members:

Come to the forum to share your thoughts or start a conversation about whatever you're working with.

Get your next Dream Book lesson or get a weekly journaling + alchemy kit.

Go the Library of Creative Dream Alchemy to find a practice that fits for where you are or use the Dream Lab if you're not sure where to start.

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I appreciate my resistance today Read More »

I make space for my dream in my daily life

By Andrea Schroeder / March 18, 2024 / daily practice, healing, inner work, journaling

This is the mantra I got in this week’s Dream Book journaling + alchemy kit: I make space for my dream in my daily life.

Well this one hits like a bomb of tangled feelings. For a few minutes I sit with this growing discomfort growling in my chest.

I was in a good mood before I picked my kit for this week, now I’m crabby.

What gives?

It feels like SO MUCH WORK to get to the life I want next. And I’m tired.

OK, what does this feeling need?

A hug. A mug of tea. Maybe a cookie. Validation. An offer to rest.

She just waves all this away.

“Yeah, yeah, whatever”

Yeah, yeah, whatever? What does that mean?

You’re just doing all the things you do.

You mean, trying my best to take care of my feelings?

[Big sigh and eye roll.]

OK so you’re a teenager.

[Big sigh.] I just want to HAVE this, not WORK FOR this. I don’t want to have to believe in myself or trust the process. I want it given to me.

A give her a big hug.

Yeah, I get it. You don’t feel you have the skills for any of this because… you don’t! You are my teenaged self, and you don’t have the emotional intelligence to even understand what’s going on behind your feelings.

You think having your life look how you want will make you feel the way you want. You have so much learning ahead of you.

And then I think about all the learning that has happened for me since I was a teenager.

And I try to bring ALL PARTS OF ME into the present moment.

My almost-50 year old self actually DOES want to work for this. I don’t consider it WORK I consider it CREATING and it’s what I am here for. I DO believe in myself and I DO trust the process.

What does my CURRENT PRESENT SELF think of this mantra?

It is a bit… “well there is a lot to do before I can really have this thing”.

I mean - I could go out and buy an RV tomorrow on credit. But I want this to NOT create financial stress. I want to be set up for it. I want it to be easy. And I know travel will take some focus, and I need space for that - like to be ahead in my work and have stronger systems and... I want to feel READY. And getting ready is a process.

So…

“I make space for my dream in my daily life”

Makes me REALLY aware of the space between where I am and where I want to be.

And I don’t feel very at peace with that today.

That’s how it is sometimes.

Dream Book members:

Come to the forum to share your thoughts or start a conversation about whatever you're working with.

Get your next Dream Book lesson or get a weekly journaling + alchemy kit.

Go the Library of Creative Dream Alchemy to find a practice that fits for where you are or use the Dream Lab if you're not sure where to start.

Check out the calendar of upcoming calls. Make a plan to join us live or catch a replay.

I make space for my dream in my daily life Read More »

I am pushing myself and it’s uncomfortable

By Andrea Schroeder / March 14, 2024 / daily practice, healing, inner work, Journal Prompts, journaling, Manifest Your Dream Life

I am pushing myself. Pushing is maybe the wrong word. I am making a BIG commitment. Like… not to something big but big as in an UNBREAKABLE commitment to myself, to do this thing consistently that I have NOT been consistent about at all…

So I am doing the thing…

And my stomach is getting all knotted up.

And I think of the life coaches online who say that this is fine. Who talk about THROWING UP from feeling so anxious about what they are doing, but pushing themselves to keep going. JUST KEEP DREAMING BIGGER! WHO CARES WHAT YOUR BODY SAYS?!?

So - no, I am not doing that.

I’m noticing my stomach knotting up, and saying “Oh, hi there, knot in my stomach.”

The knot says: I feel like this is moving too fast.

Yeah? Yeah, I can see that.

I feel like, you just made this decision this morning and now you’re already taking so many steps! Like WTF? Can we just have lunch?

Well, yeah we’re going to have lunch. But - I didn’t just make this decision suddenly this morning. Do you not see how long I’ve been thinking about this? This morning I decided to move forward, but it’s not a sudden decision.

It feels sudden.

I can totally see that. What would help you feel more comfortable with this?

I don’t want to take this step TODAY.

What would you rather do today?

I want to acknowledge we did a whole bunch of stuff today! And we can take this next step tomorrow. I want to make art. I want YOU to respect your body’s needs and capacity! We did a lot today, now let’s have lunch, make some art, rest, go to the gym later…

So you will agree to do this tomorrow?

I mean I don’t know how I’ll feel tomorrow I just know that today we took enough steps. And if you keep trying to take more steps it WILL feel like pushing beyond what your body is telling you is right and I don’t think that is the choice you want to make.

No, it’s not. But I also won’t make the choice to keep delaying this step because parts of me are uncomfortable with it. So if you get knotted up tomorrow at the thought of this, we need to have a longer discussion.

Yes, that’s fair.

Dream Book members:

Come to the forum to share your thoughts or start a conversation about whatever you're working with.

Get your next Dream Book lesson or get a weekly journaling + alchemy kit.

Go the Library of Creative Dream Alchemy to find a practice that fits for where you are or use the Dream Lab if you're not sure where to start.

Check out the calendar of upcoming calls. Make a plan to join us live or catch a replay.

I am pushing myself and it’s uncomfortable Read More »

I have tried so many times. What makes this time different?

By Andrea Schroeder / March 13, 2024 / daily practice, healing, inner work, Journal Prompts, journaling, Manifest Your Dream Life

This is something EVERYONE experiences on the path to a dream.

If you’ve never experienced it, it probably means you’re not really showing up for your dream. You’re not stretching and growing.

If you are experiencing it, you know it’s ROUGH.

Here are 2 prompts I am using to make it easier:

How do I make this time different?

How do I resolve my feelings about how this has gone in the past, and feel free to pursue this wholeheartedly, without past “failures” weighing me down?

These are the kinds of questions that need a lot of time and space to ponder. Don’t go with the first answers that come to mind.

Dream Book members:

Come to the forum to share your thoughts or start a conversation about whatever you're working with.

Get your next Dream Book lesson or get a weekly journaling + alchemy kit.

Go the Library of Creative Dream Alchemy to find a practice that fits for where you are or use the Dream Lab if you're not sure where to start.

Check out the calendar of upcoming calls. Make a plan to join us live or catch a replay.

I have tried so many times. What makes this time different? Read More »

Remember what you used to struggle with

By Andrea Schroeder / March 12, 2024 / daily practice, healing, inner work, Journal Prompts, journaling, Manifest Your Dream Life

For a while, I was struggling with SHOWING UP online.

I was writing a daily post in Dream Book, thinking about sharing those, or parts of them, on my public blog and/or social media, and not knowing HOW.

I started experimenting.

It was hard! Like, the inner part was hard. Wrapping my head about what I share where. And who I am writing to when I write. It is a MILLION times easier for me to write to the people inside Dream Book (these are my peeps! We are working together on this stuff! I know they get it!) than it is for me to write and put it on my blog.

EVEN THOUGH I know that the people who read my blog also get it, I know the general public is not cruising through here, still it feels fraught and that’s valid!

So. It took a while to work through stuff and now…

I love the way I am SHOWING UP online. All of those tangles are smooth.

And this morning I got all of my blogs scheduled for a week and felt like “UGH I haven’t gotten to the things I wanted to do, I was just doing the blogs”

AS THOUGH this is a small task.

Because once it’s not fraught anymore, it’s like I take for granted that I can just DO IT.

So instead I want to say “HEY THAT’S AMAZING!!! YOU DID IT GIRL!!!!!”

And it’s not just me.

Where are you discounting all the stuff you’ve worked through, and all the ways you’ve grown?

Dream Book members:

Come to the forum to share your thoughts or start a conversation about whatever you're working with.

Get your next Dream Book lesson or get a weekly journaling + alchemy kit.

Go the Library of Creative Dream Alchemy to find a practice that fits for where you are or use the Dream Lab if you're not sure where to start.

Check out the calendar of upcoming calls. Make a plan to join us live or catch a replay.

Remember what you used to struggle with Read More »

I hold space for my growth + expansion

By Andrea Schroeder / March 11, 2024 / daily practice, healing, inner work, journaling

This is the mantra I got in this week’s Dream Book journaling + alchemy kit: I make space for my growth + expansion.

I’m so glad I got this mantra this week, how to MAKE SPACE for growth is something I have been thinking about a lot.

I mean - my divorce feels like a FORCE of growth and expansion.

And also my feelings about the state of the world are acting as a force for growth and expansion.

So I've been thinking about HOW I MAKE and HOLD space for myself.

On our New Moon Call last week the intention that came to me was EPIC HEALING.

Which is not about epic outer results, but about epic ways of holding space for my healing and growth.

And so far, I'm thinking this means:

Quality physical self care: nutrient dense eating, lots of exercise, good sleep habits
Daily meditation + journaling
Daily time for creative projects that are NOT work projects
Starting a new art project that is kind of a touchstone for my healing goals
Holding the intention - being clear about WHY I want "epic healing", journaling about what this means for me, what I hope to get out of it and how I hope to feel while in the process

But I am thinking too about how we can’t be the ONLY ones holding space for our growth + expansion.

And how often we ARE the only ones!

How often the people closest to us cannot support our growth or our dreams.

And I don’t think that means we need to change the people who are around us, it means we need to seek out that support. (Hint hint, this is why I offer ALL of my courses and live coaching calls in ONE membership)

BUT the thing is our culture DOES NOT support our dreams or our growth, and in fact actively works AGAINST both in a lot of ways, so it becomes extremely difficult to even see what effective support would even look and feel like.

So we go without.

And it’s hurting us.

A question to ponder:

What would right-fit support look like?

Dream Book members:

Come to the forum to share your thoughts or start a conversation about whatever you're working with.

Get your next Dream Book lesson or get a weekly journaling + alchemy kit.

Go the Library of Creative Dream Alchemy to find a practice that fits for where you are or use the Dream Lab if you're not sure where to start.

Check out the calendar of upcoming calls. Make a plan to join us live or catch a replay.

I hold space for my growth + expansion Read More »

Asking bigger questions + giving those questions more space

By Andrea Schroeder / March 7, 2024 / daily practice, inner work, intention, journaling, resistance project

I am using a year-long tracker (from the Dream Plan Kit) to track when I work on my year-long Resistance Project.

There are a LOT of days not marked off.

We’re only a little over 2 months into the new year and already I’m showing up so much less…

Is what I thought was happening until I looked deeper.

What’s actually happening is I am asking much BIGGER questions.

And then taking time to be in the space of having questions without answers.

THIS DOES NEED TIME.

Rushing to FIND ANSWERS does not move you forward in the way that GIVING THE QUESTIONS MORE TIME does.

GIVING THE QUESTIONS MORE TIME moves you deeper into it, where whole new possibilities exist.

And I know it can be hard to see the difference between FINDING ANSWERS and GIVING THE QUESTIONS MORE TIME… but give it more time, you’ll see.

The new Moon Intention Setting + Alchemy Meditation Call is TODAY!!!! Dream Book members - get the call details here. The replay will be on that page a few hours after we're done the call.

If you're not in Dream Book, you can get the New Moon Intention Setting Guided Journal here! This is the same process that we do on the calls, in a workbook format!

Dream Book members:

Come to the forum to share your thoughts or start a conversation about whatever you're working with.

Get your next Dream Book lesson or get a weekly journaling + alchemy kit.

Go the Library of Creative Dream Alchemy to find a practice that fits for where you are or use the Dream Lab if you're not sure where to start.

Check out the calendar of upcoming calls. Make a plan to join us live or catch a replay.

Asking bigger questions + giving those questions more space Read More »

If you have a problem to solve or a change to make

By Andrea Schroeder / March 6, 2024 / daily practice, inner work, intention, journaling, resistance project

If you have a problem to solve or a change to make: are you spending time with it every day?

Why or why not?

As a part of my year-long project of exploring my resistance this year, this is what I’ve been wondering.

There IS a thing I want to change.

And I keep thinking “Oh! I want to change this!”

But am I showing up and being in the process of change every day?

No.

Why?

So many reasons spring to mind but they’re all actually just excuses…

And then I found a new question:

Am I in resistance here, or do I just have a really critical inner voice that I am (rightfully!) avoiding?

My “YOU SHOULD HAVE ALREADY FIGURED THIS OUT” voice is very loud. And it makes me so uncomfortable, it’s throwing this sticky shame all over me.

So, yeah, that’s not really resistance that’s self preservation.

Because CONSCIOUSLY I wasn’t really aware of how much damage this voice was causing.

But sitting with questions-without-answers and staying with the uncomfortable feelings can shift perspective and I am starting to see it.

So now I can focus on this, as a way in to exploring the thing I want to explore.

The new Moon Intention Setting + Alchemy Meditation Call is tomorrow! This is open to all Dream Book members - get the call details here.

If you're not in Dream Book, you can get the New Moon Intention Setting Guided Journal here! This is the same process that we do on the calls, in a workbook format!

Dream Book members:

Come to the forum to share your thoughts or start a conversation about whatever you're working with.

Get your next Dream Book lesson or get a weekly journaling + alchemy kit.

Go the Library of Creative Dream Alchemy to find a practice that fits for where you are or use the Dream Lab if you're not sure where to start.

Check out the calendar of upcoming calls. Make a plan to join us live or catch a replay.

If you have a problem to solve or a change to make Read More »

I am ready

By Andrea Schroeder / March 4, 2024 / daily practice, healing, inner work, journaling

Dream Book

This is the mantra I got in this week’s Dream Book journaling + alchemy kit: I am ready.

This was perfect timing for last week, as I was getting ready to share my new 10 day Creative Dream Challenge.

This feels really meaningful as it’s a new way to invite people into my work with the Creative Dream Incubator. It’s a thing I can promote heavily and joyfully.

It feels like my next chapter and it feels REALLY GOOD to step into it...

AND it feels like I still need to grow into it.

And I FEEL READY for the "stepping".

We never have to FEEL ready though.

We always ARE ready for our next steps. But not FEELING ready is pretty common - it's just one of the things we need to work through.

But reflecting on this mantra today - this is what I see:

I’ve been focusing on getting ready IN OUTER WORK.

I’ve been doing whatever INNER WORK was needed to get the OUTER WORK done.

And DREAM WORK got lost in the shuffle.

This is good information, I want to make more space for Dream Work practices this week.

Dream Book members: The Library of Creative Dream Alchemy is here, with practices for Dream Work, Inner Work and Outer Work.

Dream Book members:

Come to the forum to share your thoughts or start a conversation about whatever you're working with.

Get your next Dream Book lesson or get a weekly journaling + alchemy kit.

Go the Library of Creative Dream Alchemy to find a practice that fits for where you are or use the Dream Lab if you're not sure where to start.

Check out the calendar of upcoming calls. Make a plan to join us live or catch a replay.

I am ready Read More »

I have everything I need to do anything I want

By Andrea Schroeder / February 26, 2024 / daily practice, healing, inner work, journaling

Dream Book

This is the mantra I got in this week’s Dream Book journaling + alchemy kit: I have everything I need to do anything I want

OK wow as I am writing this, I am listening to this song. So perfect! (Success, expanded version, by Beautiful Chorus)

This is another one of the mantras that I believe is usually true.

Often we’re looking at what we wish we had, in terms of supports for our dreams, instead of using what we DO have.

I wrote this mantra in my journal with my weekly business check-in and my list of things I want to do. And it all felt so good when I wrote it. This mantra is such a healing balm for me... and yet...

I had not had a week go this OFF in a while, lol.

Like, none of the things I planned ended up being what happened.

And when I look at my list, and read this mantra, it’s like WTF?

And it feels like… trust the process.

Weekly planning is so good! (Dream Book members check out the: Creative Genius Planning Sessions and Dream Plan Kit)

AND forcing ourselves to follow through on every plan is not good.

So some weeks turn out like this.

I think it’s important to notice - are there particular tasks that ALWAYS end up undone? What’s going on there? (Take it into the Un-Sticking Station to explore it.)

But if once in a while your whole list is just a disaster? Maybe just accept that this is a part of the process? And ask:

Am I sure these are the right tasks?

Where/why am I resisting doing these things?

What would help make it easier to get this stuff done next week?

Dream Book members:

Come to the forum to share your thoughts or start a conversation about whatever you're working with.

Get your next Dream Book lesson or get a weekly journaling + alchemy kit.

Go the Library of Creative Dream Alchemy to find a practice that fits for where you are or use the Dream Lab if you're not sure where to start.

Check out the calendar of upcoming calls. Make a plan to join us live or catch a replay.

I have everything I need to do anything I want Read More »

I trust my magic

By Andrea Schroeder / February 19, 2024 / daily practice, healing, inner work, journaling

I trust my magic

This is the mantra I got in this week’s Dream Book journaling + alchemy kit: I trust my magic.

HOLY CRAP this is exactly the mantra I needed.

I've also been using "I am a powerful witch"

This keeps coming up on our calls lately and I am feeling it in my practice - the need to dig in deeper to the Dream Work, to help counteract how hard Inner Work and Outer Work are right now.

I've been journaling more lately, and one thing I am doing is just writing out all the things I want, like affirmations. "I am now open to receive...." "I feel powerful enough to ...." "I know I am ready to..." things like that.

Throughout the day I remind myself… I trust my magic. I am a powerful witch.

It’s helping.

We do need to remind ourselves of who the fuck we ARE sometimes.

As I keep sharing on our calls - all the ways that dominant culture fail us has been on my mind a lot.

Not that I want to sit around pointing fingers and not taking responsibility for my own life, but because I see the impacts every day, on all of us.

As I connect with my new dreams for the second half of my life, I have this growing feeling about how we all deserve better.

Life is sacred. It’s a gift.

Our culture degrades this gift in the name of greed.

None of this is new.

But it all feels more urgent to me.

I TRUST MY MAGIC has been helping me NOT feel helpless in the face of the state of the world, and instead look for ways to be a part of the future I want.

Dream Book members:

Come to the forum to share your thoughts or start a conversation about whatever you're working with.

Get your next Dream Book lesson or get a weekly journaling + alchemy kit.

Go the Library of Creative Dream Alchemy to find a practice that fits for where you are or use the Dream Lab if you're not sure where to start.

Check out the calendar of upcoming calls. Make a plan to join us live or catch a replay.

I trust my magic Read More »

It IS harder now.

By Andrea Schroeder / February 15, 2024 / daily practice, feel your feelings, healing, inner work, Manifest Your Dream Life

This keeps coming up with the people I work with - how HARD things are right now.

How it IS harder to stay in the kind of positive mindset you need to make things happen.

How it IS harder to rally and keep going on the long path to a dream.

How it IS harder to pay bills with the costs soaring! And how that stress impacts everything.

How it’s natural to have resistance to our dreams, how we will ALWAYS have inner work to do, and how breaking through the fog and getting into creative slow is harder now.

And how just “trying harder” or whatever - isn’t cutting it.

So I planned a series of calls to help us find our way through:

Today’s call is about Exploring Resistance + Creative Flow. (If you can't make it live, the replay will be on that page a few hours after we're done)

I’ve been working on this pretty intensely this year, and have lots of ideas to share, but when we meditate and journal together on any topic - magic happens! So I am excited to see what we discover together.

March 12 we’re doing Taking The Inner Work Deeper.

This is because most times the way to make a dream happen FASTER or BIGGER is to go DEEPER with the inner work of if.

And we all resist the things we want to resist, and then try to validate our resistance, which makes this complicated. So we’ll work on it together.

April 9 We’re doing Letting Your Dream Come To You Instead Of Chasing After It.

This one was a request from a Dream Book member (you can always let me know what kinds of topics you want to explore on these calls!) and I think is also a really important piece of how to stay positive and dreaming in these hard times.

Because sometimes when things are hard, WE get hard. We try to be more dedicated or hardworking and forget to lean into our inner magnetism and ability to draw things to us.

Not that we can just sit around and wait for the dream to manifest, there IS work for us to do since WE are the dream’s guardian on this plane, so we need to do all sorts of physical stuff to make space for it. But there is a balance we need there, to not go into CHASING and HARD WORKING our way into a dream.

And the more we are doing the Dream Work practices like this, the easier the inner work and outer work are!

Then on May 15 we’re doing Creating Self Care Protocols to Support Yourself in Being The Version of You Who Can Do Your Dream.

This is the one I am most looking forward to. Next-level self care.

All the practical physical stuff AND all the magical stuff and DELIGHTING in giving ourselves everything we need to be our absolute “best” selves - best being however you want to define it. Happy, creating, trusting your self, trusting your dreams, building your future.

These calls will all start with alchemy meditations and journaling prompts for exploring the topic and then rich discussions, sharing of ideas, and working through all the stuff that comes up.

I know times are hard!

And I know we are stronger together.

So I hope you join us for these.

(If you're not a member of Dream Book, find out more + join here)

Dream Book members:

Come to the forum to share your thoughts or start a conversation about whatever you're working with.

Get your next Dream Book lesson or get a weekly journaling + alchemy kit.

Go the Library of Creative Dream Alchemy to find a practice that fits for where you are or use the Dream Lab if you're not sure where to start.

Check out the calendar of upcoming calls. Make a plan to join us live or catch a replay.

It IS harder now. Read More »

With BIG FEELINGS flying around, how do I want to show up for my life, my self, and my dreams today?

By Andrea Schroeder / February 14, 2024 / daily practice, feel your feelings, healing, inner work, Manifest Your Dream Life

I read enough books about divorce to know that the first year after separation is hard.

A lot of different waves of feelings can hit. You can feel one thing one day, and then it’s opposite the next day. The best advice I got was to remember that none of these feelings are your new forever state, and none of your thoughts will be your forever beliefs about anything. Let them flow.

Today’s wave feels more like a bomb of sadness, anger and regret.

(I want to add - I write these posts in advance, so this isn’t about Valentine’s Day but I was delighted when I was organizing my writing into posts for this week and this is where this one fell)

And a part of me wants to process all of this as quickly and effectively as possible so I can go back to living my life, and working on my creative dreams.

But this is my life.

And creative dreaming doesn’t happen in a vacuum, it happens in our lives. Which are messy sometimes.

So. With BIG FEELINGS flying around, how do I want to show up for my life, my self, and my dreams today?

That’s the question I start with.

We don’t choose the feelings we have, we do choose how we react to them.

And I believe the best way to react to them is to VALIDATE them. We don’t have to like or enjoy the sensations a feeling provides to validate it.

Our feelings are valid responses to what is happening, and all the ways that all the things that have happened to us have impacted us.

And by validating all of that, it’s like we give the feeling space to breathe. Which is brutal in the moment but then it’s pure magic. Because there is something FOR YOU in those feelings, and you only get to receive it when you feel it.

On last week’s new moon call this came up a few times: how BIG our emotional reactions can be and how those BIG FEELINGS get in the way of being able to do the things we want (and need!) to do.

There are so many ways to work with this. We identified a few different paths, and then experimented with “how would it feel to ____” to try to find the right one.

There is no “one right path”

The world is a mess! Our lives are (sometimes?) (often?) a mess!

Figuring out how to fit our dreams into the mix of the messes we are facing is complicated - precisely because of what I was talking about in my dream status report from last week - because I need to be more PRESENT and INTENTIONAL and this is more difficult to do from within a hurricane of mess.

AND

We don’t just give up, right?

Dream Book members:

Come to the forum to share your thoughts or start a conversation about whatever you're working with.

Get your next Dream Book lesson or get a weekly journaling + alchemy kit.

Go the Library of Creative Dream Alchemy to find a practice that fits for where you are or use the Dream Lab if you're not sure where to start.

Check out the calendar of upcoming calls. Make a plan to join us live or catch a replay.

With BIG FEELINGS flying around, how do I want to show up for my life, my self, and my dreams today? Read More »

OMG Resistance

By Andrea Schroeder / February 13, 2024 / daily practice, healing, inner work, Manifest Your Dream Life, resistance project

The Exploring Resistance + Creative Flow call is happening this Thursday! Dream Book members, get the call details here.

I started the resistance project in January.

A year of exploring, healing and making art with my resistance.

I dove in excitedly in January. I learned/remembered a whole bunch of things that work for me. I removed all games from my phone, I cut my screen time way down, I increased my daily step count, I firmed up my routines and structure/organizing.

And now, I still have all of these things in place that help nurture creative flow so I feel less resistance… and I have more creative flow... and yet sometimes I am still just RIGHT IN IT.

IDON’TWANNA

This came up on our New Moon call last week - how a lot of us feel like we’re overwhelmed and it’s just REALLY HARD to do the things we want to do.

I think it’s good to remember that there are external forces acting that ARE making it harder. The state of the world DOES impact our mental state.

Creative Dreaming is LIVING AS A VISIONARY and this is actually a big deal. It’s exhausting even in the best of times and these are not the best of times.

So it’s understandable that I have these days some days.

AND I really want to explore my resistance consistently this year so…

This morning my resistance shows up as:

Resistance to going for my morning walk to a coffee shop. My plan was to go to the “45 minute walk” coffee shop. But it is cold and windy, and after 2 weeks of un-heard of warm weather it means switching back into winter gear and maybe that’s too much today… so I bargained with myself… what about the 30 minute walk place? Or the 20 minute walk place, I mean we don’t like that place very much but 20 minutes feels so doable, right? Or… I mean there is a 1 minute walk coffee shop too... Can we do that?

Nope. The thought of getting dressed and going into the world was a big NO this morning. (Being self employed and the freedom it brings is one of my biggest dreams, and I recognize how lucky I am to be able to make this choice.)

But, even comfy at home in my PJs with my coffee and my cat Bear snuggled up in his bean bag chair beside my desk I have a lot of mental resistance today.

I feel HEAVY.

I also feel resistance to the resistance. Like WTF ANDREA? Just do the things that you DO want to do!

I look out the window. Maybe I will go out? Exercise and fresh air may be all I need?

On the other hand, maybe I need a break? A day off?

There is nothing urgent I need to do today BUT there is something I really do want to do. And that’s another thing we talked about on the New Moon call… how we can rally and get the stuff done that needs to happen. How none of us would just not show up for our clients. But then we end up not showing up for ourselves as well - that we don’t get to those projects that don’t have any external deadlines.

So I feel 50/50 - yes a day off would be nice AND totally justifiable. And yes a whole day to work on that project that I really do want to do feels really good.

My pre-pandemic self felt this way so rarely, that when I did feel this way I tended to take it as a sign that I needed a break, and take it.

But since 2020 I feel this way much more often, and I actually don’t want to take that many breaks. I want to move my projects forward.

OK! Good information!

I have resistance AND resistance to the resistance AND this inner knowing about what I actually DO want to do.

So what’s in my way?

(This is where I pop onto Facebook to see if there is anything interesting happening there)

No! Come back! We are journaling our way THROUGH this! Keep going!

What’s in my way?

I think about doing what I want to do, and I get a “brain swirl”.

What’s the brain swirl?

I sit with that a few minutes. It’s this tiny little part of me who is riding some kind of spacecraft that swirls around in my head, trying to create an energy stream that directs my thinking away from this project.

Wow, interesting! Why?

She wants to go get ice cream.

OK well that is SUPER interesting, because there is an ice cream shop near one of the places we could go to work this morning. But do you think this is literal - like part of you want to get ice cream? Or do you think it’s more like she wants to go play and not think about work?

I think she is BRAIN SWIRLING us right now and we can’t stay focused on what we are trying to process.

Right, yeah.

OK I think it’s obvious that if I stay home I’m just going to swirl around in my thoughts and not do this thing. AND I am resisting the plan I had made. So we need to come up with a new plan!

Oh I just realized what the problem is.

That project I want to work on today. It’s “starting something new” and “working on a thing that really matters to me” and both of those things bring up ALL THE THINGS.

The vulnerability of trying something new.

The fear that it won’t work out.

The doubt that I can really pull it off in the way I want to.

The “why bother? No one cares”

The worry that it will be too hard.

The worry that no one will understand what I am trying to do.

THE THINGS that come up for everyone with their dreams at some point. For me it happens mostly at the start, and then again right before it’s done.

Having named “the resistance” for what it is, and having worked through all of these fears/doubts so many times over the years (there is a whole library of inner work practices for this in Dream Book!) I just need to find the gentlest way to begin.

NAMING it really shifts it.

Instead of “some weird brain swirl that won’t let me focus” I know “this is hard and scary because it’s so vulnerable to start a new thing”.

And I know what helps with this:

Un-Sticking Station or other practices from the Library of Inner Work

Dream Self process to connect with the part of me who knows how to do this

Dream Lab process to connect with my enthusiasm for doing this

And now I feel ready to get started.

Making space to process all of our thoughts and feelings will naturally bring you to your truth. Your truth will include HOW MUCH you want to do the things you want to do - even when they are scary.

SO excited to explore this on the Exploring Resistance + Creative Flow call on Thursday! If you're not in Dream Book, now is a great time to join!

Dream Book members:

Come to the forum to share your thoughts or start a conversation about whatever you're working with.

Get your next Dream Book lesson or get a weekly journaling + alchemy kit.

Go the Library of Creative Dream Alchemy to find a practice that fits for where you are or use the Dream Lab if you're not sure where to start.

Check out the calendar of upcoming calls. Make a plan to join us live or catch a replay.

OMG Resistance Read More »

I am moving in the right direction

By Andrea Schroeder / February 12, 2024 / daily practice, healing, inner work, journaling

I am moving in the right direction

This is the mantra I got in this week’s journaling + alchemy kit: I am moving in the right direction.

DIRECTION is SO MUCH MORE IMPORTANT than speed! And yet we all get discouraged at how long things can take.

I started weightlifting (again) in December. Between the holiday season in December and then January hitting kind of hard - I took about a month off and started back at it late in January.

But this week I’ve been noticing my shoulders, arms and legs are starting to look different.

And it’s like “what?! I’ve barely done anything!” I am only even aiming to go twice a week, which means some weeks I only go once. I’m not trying to do body building, I’m just trying to counteract the loss of muscle that happens at this age, because getting those muscles back helps my energy and mental health so much.

So I am taking tiny steps but I AM MOVING IN THE RIGHT DIRECTION.

And as long as I keep taking tiny steps - they do add up and move me towards where I want to be.

AND

Nothing is guaranteed, in terms of outer outcomes, of course!

But - how does it feel to say to yourself “I am moving in the right direction”?

And there some places where this is uncomfortable?

What are those places telling you?

Dream Book members:

Come to the forum to share your thoughts or start a conversation about whatever you're working with.

Get your next Dream Book lesson or get a weekly journaling + alchemy kit.

Go the Library of Creative Dream Alchemy to find a practice that fits for where you are or use the Dream Lab if you're not sure where to start.

Check out the calendar of upcoming calls. Make a plan to join us live or catch a replay.

I am moving in the right direction Read More »