How Emotions Are Made

By Andrea Schroeder / April 3, 2024 / daily practice, feel your feelings, healing, inner work

I’ve been reading How Emotions Are Made: The Secret Life of the Brain by Lise Feldman Barrett.

It’s about the latest scientific studies about how our brain works to create emotions. It shows that a lot of our current cultural understanding of how emotions work is wrong.

And it confirmed that everything I’ve been doing in my work is right. Which is always nice! But, of course it’s right, I didn’t pull these ideas out of my ass. I developed them over many years of working with people.

Reading about this research helped solidify some things for me, which has been especially helpful during my divorce when emotions are flying, and often flying right into each other as they contradict each other so much. And then it’s all topped off with a heavy coat of peri-menopause anxiety.

None of my feelings are TRUE.

There is nothing in our bodies or brains that says we have to feel certain ways about certain things. Contrary to popular belief - there is no universality to feelings.

The way our brains create our emotional state is based on our own past history and patterns. We LEARN this.

All of my feelings are VALID. There is no sense in telling myself not to feel a certain thing - ignoring/suppressing feelings is extremely ill-advised.

The helpful thing to do with feelings we find uncomfortable is to get CURIOUS about them.

WORK WITH THEM.

Yes, start by, validating that you ARE indeed feeling however you're feeling and then actually literally FEELING THE FEELING in your body helps you move THROUGH it.

But that same feeling WILL COME BACK the next time you’re in a similar situation. Feeling our feelings releases them but does not change the patterns.

Curiosity is an incredibly powerful tool for healing and changing patterns.

You can see it every time I share a post here using the Un-Sticking Station. I can be HORRIBLY stuck with something, and getting curious, sitting down and having a picnic with it to find out how we can work together - shifts it every time.

Since we LEARN our emotional responses to the outer world - our feelings are cultural.

And our culture is a flaming trash heap.

So becoming more skilled at the inner work is actually necessary for freeing ourselves of the ways our culture holds us back from being who we really are.

Which is so connected to creative dreaming there isn’t a way to separate them.

Your dream is your soul showing you who you really are, it’s how your soul lights your path for you.

Your FEELINGS ABOUT your dream are your conditioned responses that you learned from living in this culture - they are not necessarily true, helpful, or needed.

Dream Book members:

Come to the forum to share your thoughts or start a conversation about whatever you're working with.

Get your next Dream Book lesson or get a weekly journaling + alchemy kit.

Go the Library of Creative Dream Alchemy to find a practice that fits for where you are or use the Dream Lab if you're not sure where to start.

Check out the calendar of upcoming calls. Make a plan to join us live or catch a replay.

How Emotions Are Made Read More »

It IS harder now.

By Andrea Schroeder / February 15, 2024 / daily practice, feel your feelings, healing, inner work, Manifest Your Dream Life

This keeps coming up with the people I work with - how HARD things are right now.

How it IS harder to stay in the kind of positive mindset you need to make things happen.

How it IS harder to rally and keep going on the long path to a dream.

How it IS harder to pay bills with the costs soaring! And how that stress impacts everything.

How it’s natural to have resistance to our dreams, how we will ALWAYS have inner work to do, and how breaking through the fog and getting into creative slow is harder now.

And how just “trying harder” or whatever - isn’t cutting it.

So I planned a series of calls to help us find our way through:

Today’s call is about Exploring Resistance + Creative Flow. (If you can't make it live, the replay will be on that page a few hours after we're done)

I’ve been working on this pretty intensely this year, and have lots of ideas to share, but when we meditate and journal together on any topic - magic happens! So I am excited to see what we discover together.

March 12 we’re doing Taking The Inner Work Deeper.

This is because most times the way to make a dream happen FASTER or BIGGER is to go DEEPER with the inner work of if.

And we all resist the things we want to resist, and then try to validate our resistance, which makes this complicated. So we’ll work on it together.

April 9 We’re doing Letting Your Dream Come To You Instead Of Chasing After It.

This one was a request from a Dream Book member (you can always let me know what kinds of topics you want to explore on these calls!) and I think is also a really important piece of how to stay positive and dreaming in these hard times.

Because sometimes when things are hard, WE get hard. We try to be more dedicated or hardworking and forget to lean into our inner magnetism and ability to draw things to us.

Not that we can just sit around and wait for the dream to manifest, there IS work for us to do since WE are the dream’s guardian on this plane, so we need to do all sorts of physical stuff to make space for it. But there is a balance we need there, to not go into CHASING and HARD WORKING our way into a dream.

And the more we are doing the Dream Work practices like this, the easier the inner work and outer work are!

Then on May 15 we’re doing Creating Self Care Protocols to Support Yourself in Being The Version of You Who Can Do Your Dream.

This is the one I am most looking forward to. Next-level self care.

All the practical physical stuff AND all the magical stuff and DELIGHTING in giving ourselves everything we need to be our absolute “best” selves - best being however you want to define it. Happy, creating, trusting your self, trusting your dreams, building your future.

These calls will all start with alchemy meditations and journaling prompts for exploring the topic and then rich discussions, sharing of ideas, and working through all the stuff that comes up.

I know times are hard!

And I know we are stronger together.

So I hope you join us for these.

(If you're not a member of Dream Book, find out more + join here)

Dream Book members:

Come to the forum to share your thoughts or start a conversation about whatever you're working with.

Get your next Dream Book lesson or get a weekly journaling + alchemy kit.

Go the Library of Creative Dream Alchemy to find a practice that fits for where you are or use the Dream Lab if you're not sure where to start.

Check out the calendar of upcoming calls. Make a plan to join us live or catch a replay.

It IS harder now. Read More »

With BIG FEELINGS flying around, how do I want to show up for my life, my self, and my dreams today?

By Andrea Schroeder / February 14, 2024 / daily practice, feel your feelings, healing, inner work, Manifest Your Dream Life

I read enough books about divorce to know that the first year after separation is hard.

A lot of different waves of feelings can hit. You can feel one thing one day, and then it’s opposite the next day. The best advice I got was to remember that none of these feelings are your new forever state, and none of your thoughts will be your forever beliefs about anything. Let them flow.

Today’s wave feels more like a bomb of sadness, anger and regret.

(I want to add - I write these posts in advance, so this isn’t about Valentine’s Day but I was delighted when I was organizing my writing into posts for this week and this is where this one fell)

And a part of me wants to process all of this as quickly and effectively as possible so I can go back to living my life, and working on my creative dreams.

But this is my life.

And creative dreaming doesn’t happen in a vacuum, it happens in our lives. Which are messy sometimes.

So. With BIG FEELINGS flying around, how do I want to show up for my life, my self, and my dreams today?

That’s the question I start with.

We don’t choose the feelings we have, we do choose how we react to them.

And I believe the best way to react to them is to VALIDATE them. We don’t have to like or enjoy the sensations a feeling provides to validate it.

Our feelings are valid responses to what is happening, and all the ways that all the things that have happened to us have impacted us.

And by validating all of that, it’s like we give the feeling space to breathe. Which is brutal in the moment but then it’s pure magic. Because there is something FOR YOU in those feelings, and you only get to receive it when you feel it.

On last week’s new moon call this came up a few times: how BIG our emotional reactions can be and how those BIG FEELINGS get in the way of being able to do the things we want (and need!) to do.

There are so many ways to work with this. We identified a few different paths, and then experimented with “how would it feel to ____” to try to find the right one.

There is no “one right path”

The world is a mess! Our lives are (sometimes?) (often?) a mess!

Figuring out how to fit our dreams into the mix of the messes we are facing is complicated - precisely because of what I was talking about in my dream status report from last week - because I need to be more PRESENT and INTENTIONAL and this is more difficult to do from within a hurricane of mess.

AND

We don’t just give up, right?

Dream Book members:

Come to the forum to share your thoughts or start a conversation about whatever you're working with.

Get your next Dream Book lesson or get a weekly journaling + alchemy kit.

Go the Library of Creative Dream Alchemy to find a practice that fits for where you are or use the Dream Lab if you're not sure where to start.

Check out the calendar of upcoming calls. Make a plan to join us live or catch a replay.

With BIG FEELINGS flying around, how do I want to show up for my life, my self, and my dreams today? Read More »

Which parts are you avoiding?

By Andrea Schroeder / January 17, 2024 / feel your feelings, healing, Journal Prompts, Manifest Your Dream Life

I’m still thinking about how I show up here and how I want to show up here.

I love how I show up on classes and calls, but the ways I share my work outside of those circles often feels fraught.

Working with dreams is intensely vulnerable. Most dreams never even get named because most people find it too vulnerable to even get close. This is one of the ways dominant culture fails us, by not holding space for vulnerability.

This is why I’ve always shared my thoughts, stories and feelings online the way I do.

This is why I share my stumblings as much as my successes. I probably share them more because I want all of us to see them as no big deal.

Failure IS a tool for building your dreams. If you can’t use it, you can’t build anything.

And personally we all get upset when we fail - for good reason.

But then culturally we’ve created this space where it’s not at all safe to fail. Which ricochets back to our own personal relationships with failure, heightening all of the already difficult feelings.

So I share my little stories as a way of chipping away at that. This feels important to me but it’s not always comfortable!!!

I’m living proof that you can be vulnerable and survive.

Not that I am saying you need to be vulnerable in public like I do!

But you do need to be able to tell yourself the truth about what you want, and what’s in the way, and all of the feelings that get sparked in all of that.

And I know it can feel safer to avoid all of that… but thoughts and feeling that we avoid don’t actually go away.

So - what parts are you avoiding today?

And what teeny tiny little baby step can you take with that?

Dream Book members:

Come to the forum to share your thoughts or start a conversation about whatever you're working with.

Get your next Dream Book lesson or get a weekly journaling + alchemy kit.

Go the Library of Creative Dream Alchemy to find a practice that fits for where you are or use the Dream Lab if you're not sure where to start.

Check out the calendar of upcoming calls. Make a plan to join us live or catch a replay.

Which parts are you avoiding? Read More »