Overwhelm is moving so fast I can’t really see it.? But I can tell that it feels actually kind of happy, like there are a lot of different possibilities dancing in it.

Huh, this is interesting – I feel overwhelmed, and yet overwhelm feels like dancing.? What?

Deep breath.? I just want to meet myself where I am.? I don’t have to make sense of where I am.? My feelings don’t have to make sense, they are valid just as they are.

OK, I am confused because I feel overwhelmed but overwhelm seems to feel happy.? So why can’t I just feel happy?

Overwhelm is a juggling act that is moving so fast I can’t see exactly what is happening.? I worry that things will get lost in the juggling.

Overwhelm trusts itself to handle everything.

So does that mean I don’t trust myself to handle everything?

No, I guess I don’t.? Because I am worried about dropping things.? And I’m worried about not dropping things, but exhausting myself in the process.? I’m worried about not doing my best work.? I’m worried about making the wrong decision.? I’m worried that people will be upset that I am not doing things they way that they want me to do things.

Take each of those worries, and times by the four major projects that each need to be done RIGHT NOW.? And then throw in the 2 projects that I really want to be doing.

Yeah, I see why I feel overwhelmed.

I am so curious!? Why is overwhelm happy and dancing?

(more sitting with it)

I see it more clearly now, it looks like a whirling dirvish (Sufi dancer).? This isn’t the best photo, but this is where I saw whirling dirvishes, inside an old hamman, in Istanbul:

How amazing is this?? I LOVED the whirling dirvishes.? I totally remember that night, they were not spinning out of control.? More like spinning in ecstasy.

All these projects, all these decisions, all these worries, this is what I’m dancing with right now.

The more things I am dancing with, the more potential the dance contains.? It’s a good thing.

That’s why overwhelm feels happy.? Potential and possibilities and creating wonderful new things.? Dancing new dreams into life.

Ummmm, so I don’t actually feel overwhelmed at all.

It’s just my fears and inner critics get stirred up by new things, so they are stirred up, and they made up a story about overwhelm (!) ?The purpose of the story is to slow me down and keep me where I am.

Holy crap!? My whole life I have been easily overwhelmed and I feel that starting to unravel right now.

• I don’t actually feel overwhelmed if I do one thing at a time.
• I don’t actually feel overwhelmed when I am trusting myself.
• II don’t actually feel overwhelmed if I being present and emotionally honest with myself.

Most of the times when I have felt overwhelmed, really I was just believing a bullshit story that my fears and inner critics were telling me.

So what does that mean?? What do I do with this?? How does knowing this change what’s happening for me right now?

• The many projects on my plate feel a little more fun and a little less daunting.
• I’m remembering how much I love my work and am grateful for these projects.
• I have more permission to take the time I need to get things done.
• I’m remembering that things usually take less time than I think they will.? Um, except for the times when things take more time than I think they will.? The more important thing to remember here is that the timing really isn’t up to me.
• It feels easy to approach my Creative Genius Planning Session for this week from a spirit of curiosity and trust and to find a way to make it all work.
• I still have more questions than answers, but instead of that feeling frustrating and scary it feels like a natural part of growing and creating.? And it gets to suck and feel frustrating sometimes but that doesn’t have to throw the whole dance off it’s rhythm.
• I trust myself to do my best.
• My stomach isn’t all in knots anymore.

So now I’m feeling like my insides were just re-arranged, so I will stop there for tonight, and come back to this tomorrow in my Creative Genius Planning Session.

These stories I’ve been sharing, of meeting with resistance and overwhelm and procrastination are my notes from my trips to the Un-Sticking Station in the Creative Dream Circle – notes from the intuitive healing process.

Last week I shared a story about feeling resentful.

So later on I sat with my glowing red ember.

You can’t heal anything that you can’t be with.

And it turns out I have a long history of not being with this glowing red ember, and I don’t really know how to be with it.

So I start by asking it what it wants.

It wants space.? Space to glow red and hot.? But BIG space, and PRIVATE space, so that she can glow as red and hot as she likes and she won’t hurt anyone.

Like a cave?

Yes, like a cave.? A cave that no one can come in.

No one? Ever? I love that you don’t want to hurt anyone but I would sure love to come and visit you, if that’s ok with you.

Oh yes! I would love visitors!? I just don’t want anyone to wander into the cave not knowing that I am here, and get burned.

So many if we set up a little checkpoint to let people know you’re here, so they can be careful?

Yes, I like that.

I sit down along the walls of the cave.? The glowing red ember is glowing in the center of the cave.

Is this enough room?

Yes, I like this.? I really like having space to glow.

I kept you buried for a long time, and you didn’t have space to glow, right?

Well, I was still still glowing.? It’s just that the dirt glowed.? Here, when I have more space, the air glows.? I really like it when the air glows.

Hmmm.? A little ironic that my resentment is not resentful towards me for burying her.

Oh gosh no, I love you.? I’m here to help.

Something deep inside me shifted when I realised that, and I sat with it for a few days.

I always love when my clients feel resentful about something because resentment tends to come from deep self-care.? Resentment speaks up for you when you’re not doing the best job of speaking up for yourself.

So I was feeling resentful about how much time I put into creating my classes and how much time the new Mandala class was going to take.? Which is weird, because I LOVE creating classes and I LOVE that this is my job and I am GRATEFUL.

But, apparently, also resentful.

When I gave BOTH my love of what I’m doing and resentment towards what I’m doing space to exist and be three things became very clear:

1. I am not unhappy with what I’m doing.? I’m very happy actually.
2. There is this other thing I want to be doing too.
3. It would be easy for me to make space to do BOTH things.? In fact, the other thing I want to do will fuel and nurture the classes, and vice versa.

The red glowing ember is glowing happily.

It just wanted me to be doing more things I could love doing.

I feel resentful, and ashamed that I feel resentful and resisting both feeling resentful and feeling ashamed and telling myself I should feel differently.

Oy. No wonder it is hard to get to work this morning.

My feelings, even the most vicious and angry ones, rarely show up as monsters. But today, this feeling, is a monster.

I?m sitting across the table from it. I?m placing two facts on the table:

1. How I feel is valid. It doesn?t have to make sense to my logical mind.
2. This is the time of the month when everything feels wrong. Maybe I can cut myself some slack?

As the monster picks up these two facts, he transforms into the Cookie Monster. The two facts are now chocolate chip cookies which are quickly being gobbled up.? There are crumbs flying everywhere.

Crumbs. Little crumbs of what is true.

I get to feel how I feel. Things get to suck right now. Or, actually things don?t suck but I get to feel like they suck.

Well that doesn?t make sense. Life is going soooo good for you right now, it?s so stupid that you would feel resentful about anything! Look at how much you have!

So, you can?t agree that my feelings don?t have to make sense? Would you say that to someone else? If someone felt sad would you tell them to feel happy?

No. Of course not. If you felt sad that would be ok. But resentful? With everything that you have? That?s gross.

Oh, so I don?t get to feel resentful, ever?

You have no reason to.

Why is resentful different from sad? If I can be sad for no reason why can?t I be resentful for no reason?

Because resentful is ugly. You have to be a small bitter little person to be resentful when you have everything that you have.

Wow, who make up that rule?

It?s just?. I don?t know. It?s true.

Remember that cookie you ate that said that how I feel is valid?

Yeah, it?s giving me indigestion.

OK. So if all feelings are valid, then you get to feel judgmental and upset that I feel resentful, and I get to feel resentful.

I hand Cookie Monster some bubblegum flavoured medicine for his indigestion.

Yikes!? I was trying to change how the monster felt, so it would validate how I feel.

But the truth is that all feelings are valid and there is space here for all feelings.

The table got bigger, and instead of sitting at small, hard chairs now we?re sitting in great big comfy stuffed sofas.

But it?s interesting, Cookie Monster, how much judgement and upset you have towards me feeling resentful.? When did it become a rule that I don?t get to feel resentful?

Oh. Right. That’s when.

OK, no need to re-hash that story but yes I see where and when and how it became a rule that I don?t get to feel resentful. And I see that you, Cookie Monster, are trying to make sure I?m ok.

Because it?s not safe to feel resentful.

But that was then. And now I make the rules. And it really is a rule that I get to feel whatever I actually feel.

*poof* Cookie Monster disappears.

I am alone with my resentment, which is a small red glowing ember.

It feels like it?s been buried for a long time. And it has a lot that it can teach me, but first we need to get to know each other.

Let’s call him PAGTTTS.

He’s sitting across the table from me, in his fancy expansive suit and crisp white papers, which he is tapping on the table, to get the stack perfectly stacked.

I think you’ll be interested in what these here papers have to say.

I kind of doubt that.

You can’t ignore what people think.? This is important.

The stack of papers is growing as you’re speaking.? Don’t you think they’ll keep growing as I am reading them? How could I ever keep up?

Keeping up isn’t the point.? Being informed is the point.? You always have to be as informed as you possibly can be and you’re not getting any closer just sitting there ignoring the growing stack.

No, being informed can’t be the point.? WHY do you want me to be informed?

What are you, a moron?? I want you to be informed so that you know what people want, so that you do what they want, so that they are happy with everything you do.

*cue Mission Impossible theme.

You see that that’s not possible, right?

PAGTTTS puts the stack down and puts both hands down onto the table and leans forward in a menacing way.? He means it to be menacing but that stack of papers is growing so fast I can’t even see him.

Look, can’t you see that you’re drowning in other people’s opinions and that the problem is only getting worse?

The problem is only getting worse because you are ignoring the papers.

OK, Stop.

I get up and take the stack of papers and put them into their own special house, which can grow along with the stack if need be.

PAGTTTS shrinks.? I bring him a booster seat.

Look, I want us to work this out.? But I can’t talk to you through the stack of paper.

It’s not just a stack of paper, it’s other people’s opinions and they matter.

The stack is out of control.? Look at the house I put it in just a few seconds ago.? It’s 57 stories tall already.? You can put on all the power suits in the world you’re still not going to be powerful enough to handle the stack.? It’s not handle-able.

That’s my job.? Don’t tell me not to do my job.

Your job is to make sure I know what everyone else wants, always, so I can do what everyone else wants, always, so everyone else is happy with me and my work, always.? Is that right?

Don’t you see how much easier your life would be if you were working with me on this?? Everyone would be happy with you, always!

Everyone, except me.

What?? PAGTTTS had started getting bigger but now he shrunk right back down to toddler size.

If I’m just doing what other people want me to be doing then I might as well be a robot.?? That is a BETRAYAL of my creativity and my purpose.? When I make “making other people happy” more important than “doing what is true for me” I don’t do what is true for me and dilute my power and my purpose.

I’m holding up 2 computer chips: one is Making Other People Happy and the other is Doing What Is True For Me.? Only one can fit in the computer.

Other people’s opinions are other people’s business – not mine.? They get between me and my creativity and purpose and make progress impossible.

There is silence for a few minutes.

Listen mister I don’t want to offend you but I can not and will not waste my precious life keeping tabs on what everyone else wants me to do.? I’m putting my foot down.

And just like that, PAGTTTS transforms into Glinda the Good Witch.

That’s a pretty costume, but I think you’re just trying to fool me into doing what you want by making me think you’re on my side.

I am on your side!? But PAGTTTS is having a hard time keeping his costume on and now Glinda is wearing a power suit and looking very uncomfortable.

Don’t you see what happens when I try to make everyone happy?? It’s crazy-making.

Also, have you not heard of sovereignty?

Oh! Of course, that’s it.? Approval-seeking keeps everyone out of their thrones.

I place a crown on PAGTTTS’s head.

PAGTTTS is now a very happy baby, in a purple velvet throne wearing a ridiculously jeweled crown.

I turn around and look into the mirror behind me.? Sure enough, my crown is intact.? And I’m ready to get back to work, creating work that some people will surely misunderstood and others will surely dislike but it’s not my job to pay attention to any of that.

I look at what I’ve done so far on my project and decide to shelve the whole thing and start over.? Turn out PAGTTTS was whispering in my ear and throwing me off track the whole time.? I’m ready now, to do this my way.

My tiny fairy tales are my notes from visiting the Un-Sticking Station inside the Creative Dream Circle which un-sticks stucks like: procrastination, perfectionism, fear, lack of clarity, not knowing what to do and not believing in yourself enough to make your dream real. I created the Un-Sticking Station because I get stuck every day and no not want to STAY stuck, ever.

Scene: a girl and an ancient stone well, in a clearing, in a forest.

She went to the well looking for an answer. She only meant to dip the little bucket in and pull up what she needed, but the well quickly pulled her right in, all the way down to the bottom. Which, she was surprised to learn, wasn?t wet.

At the bottom of the well, sitting on soft, dry land, it was almost like the light was sparkling, but she thought it was just her eyes, adjusting to the low light.

Sure enough though, the bottom of the well seemed to be home to a sprinkle of fireflies.

Illumination. Magic. Isn?t this what you came here for?

Well, yes, I wanted just a scoop though.

Just a scoop? There is no scoop. You?re in the well or you?re outside of the well.

She noticed that she actually felt different, now that she was inside the well and wondered if the voice, which she assumed was the voice of the fireflies, was maybe right.

What you wanted was a scoop of magic which you could bring back to your people. And then, presumably, each one would scoop out a thimbleful of magic for themselves. What good is that?

Well when you say it that way it sounds ridiculous. I wanted to show them the scoop of magic so they could learn more about it and how to create more – how to create their own magic.

You don?t create magic. You are magic. Come on, you know this.

Well, yes – that?s what I wanted them to discover in this process. That the magic is inside of them. That the tiny thimbleful that I could give them is pathetic, compared to the magnitude of magic they contain within them. I wanted them to have that visceral experience of absolute knowing that – that the magic within outshines anything anyone else can give you.

And does being here in the well of your own inner magic make you think of a better way to do this?

Yes.

And isn?t that what you were really looking for?

Yes. Sharing a tiny scoop of my magic doesn?t help them with their magic at all. I mean, what if they start to mistake MY magic as THE magic? I am NOT going to be that teacher.

The girl sits in silence.

After a few minutes, the fireflies come in closer and start to multiply, filling the energy around her with sparkles.

Illumination. Magic. That?s what you came here for.

The girl?s heart lights up like a giant firefly, and each beat of her heart sent sparkles circulating through her body.

And she knew exactly how to proceed with her class.

EPILOGUE: Forty minutes after writing this fairy tale, the girl completed the content for The Magic Journal Class. Fairy tales are potent magic.

PS: To celebrate the new Magic Journal Class I’m hosting a FREE live streaming video class where I’ll share new ways to tap into your inner magic.? Join us right here.