I set a big goal for my business for 2014: to welcome 800 dreamers into my Creative Dream Circle. And to do this not by getting super pushy about selling – but to do this with heart and soul and creativity and joy and LOVE.(you can read my original post about this here)

At this point though, I’m not interested in the numbers. I’ve been more interested in exploring how to grow my capacity serve dreamers in bringing their dreams to life. And now I want to explore more about how I want this all to work for me, and how I want to feel inside it.

In support of this goal, I am writing weekly updates on Fridays, for all of 2014. This is where I’ll share the story of all the ups and downs of bringing a big dream to life.

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Last week I just did a quick update because so much was happening.? The more you’ve got going on the more important it becomes to take time to reflect on what’s going on.? Otherwise you end up moving in the direction that outside forces want to lead you in, and not in the direction of your choosing.

These weekly updates are grounding and orienting me on/in the path as I continue to move towards this dream.

What has really changed for me recently is my perspective.?? And it’s changed somewhere deep down inside and it hasn’t quite bubbled up to the surface yet as a clear understanding of what it is, exactly, that has changed.? All I know is that I see everything differently now.? And I like it.

It’s the end of June.? I’m six months into working on this dream, holding it with deep commitment and steady progress. I just wanted to point that out because sometimes I hear people try something once and nothing happens so they give up.? The only way to win is to stay in the game.? And if your dream doesn’t matter enough for you to stay in the game then you’re working on the wrong dream.? When your dream leads you into deeper alignment with your own heart and soul there is never a reason to give up on it.

I am so in love with my dream, with the Creative Dream Circle, and with how it’s changing lives.

Sometimes people join and they’re unsure…

• they don’t quite believe in themselves
• there’s this thing that has been stuck and they haven’t known how to un-stick it
• they’re not sure they know what their dream is
• they want their dream so bad but they think it could be impossible

And they start using the Circle and everything starts to brighten up.

Or else they join and they’re all lit up and inspired and ready to work on that HUGE and so amazing they can hardly speak its name dream and the Circle works its magic and, miracle of miracles, they get what they wanted.? They get what they really, really wanted!? Do you know how rare that is in our world?

Healing. Transformation. Miracles. I don’t use any of those words lightly.? And I see them happen all the time.? What I have to offer here is really amazing, it’s not like anything else out there and it’s making the world a better place.? I feel protective and nurture-y about the Circle.

I’m feeling more clear about doing what I need to do to take care of this: stronger and clearer boundaries all around. So a few things are going to change.

One thing is that the cost of the Circle is going to increase.

I’m still working out the details of when and how much but this is happening.? When you sign up at the current $100 price, you can stay in the Circle for $100/year for as long as you choose to remain a member.? Even when the price increases your price will stay the same until you cancel your subscription.

The other thing is that my free weekly videos are on hiatus for now.?

There are just other things that need my attention right now.? One thought I have is that those videos may come back in the Circle only.? All I know for sure is that I need permission (from myself!) to not do these right now.

The big change is on the inside.

Over the last few weeks, the experience of connecting with the heart and soul of my dream has totally changed.? Now it shows up as a wheel inside me.? It’s like the dream and I have merged and I am more quickly growing into the me-who-can-hold-this-in-her-energy-field.? This is the best feeling ever.

And onto the Creative Dream Update questions:

What happened in the last week?

The qualities that were helping me on my journey this week were: courage, movement and expansion:

The pic from my Creative Genius Planning Session on Monday, which I wrote about here.? I love my Creative Genius Planning Sessions Kit because it helps me consistently move forward in ways that are healing and nurturing for ALL parts of me (no bulldozing or forcing myself to do shit I don’t want to do) even when I feel doubtful and afraid and can’t see my next steps.

So I’m not just making external progress, I’m growing into who I want to be on the inside (while also making external progress towards creating the life I want to be living).

And I’m still doing tons of mandala drawing:

And I am just really happy: still soaking up the afterglow of the Love Your Life Creative Journal Class (people keep emailing me to ask if they can still get this class if they join the Circle now – the answer is YES. And also – do it!? Loving your life is the BEST) and doing lots of things I love: drawing, journaling, bike rides, park visits, getting lots of sleep and reiki, etc, etc, etc.

The small coaching group for healers/teachers/coaches started and I am 100% in LOVE with everyone in the group.? So amazing gather a group of creative world-changers together and I love how inspiring our first call was.? Plus – the group sold out with hardly any promoting, I am really happy about that.

As a student, I started a new class on marketing, and finished the business class I had been in for the last 3 months.? I am almost always taking a class – I love working with lots of different teachers and mentors.? Feeling inspired and supported.

And I gave the Give Your Dream Wings e-course (my free introductory course) a makeover.? As I was doing that I was re-listening to the videos and holy crap that’s an amazing class.? Simple and effective.? Thinking I may want to do a bit more to promote it.

How do I feel about this?

I’m excited about some new shifts I see happening in my business.? I’m noticing places where I used to hold back, and am not willing to keep holding back.? I’m also seeing places where I’m not doing things as efficiently as I could and feel inspired to CHANGE those things.? Progress!

I’m also feeling this really deep down happiness mixed with trust and light.? It’s like I’ve climbed halfway up the mountain.? I’m feeling amazing from the exercise and fresh air, and already the view is fucking amazing and has transformed my perspective on everything.? And there’s still more mountain to climb so who even knows how much better this is going to get!

What do I need now?

To look at some shifts in my work schedule.? I want more time dedicated to this new class I’m taking – to be implementing everything immediately into my business.? Plus some new ideas are coming to me for things to do inside the Circle, I want some time to explore them.

And I think I need MORE journaling time.

What does my dream need now?

This week my dream is a wheel and it needs me to turn with it.

I think I understand what this means, and that making these shifts in my work schedule are how I start to turn with it.? It’s also a mindset shift though, so my dream needs for me to have more quiet time to myself to be with that and let it sink in.

Taking all this into account, my next mission is:

More journaling. Schedule shifts. Making space for new ways of doing this, letting go of old ways.

I set a big goal for my business for 2014: to welcome 800 dreamers into my Creative Dream Circle. And to do this not by getting super pushy about selling ? but to do this with heart and soul and creativity and joy and LOVE.(you can read my original post about this here)

At this point though, I?m not interested in the numbers. I?ve been more interested in exploring how to grow my capacity to serve more creatives in bringing their dreams to life. And I want to explore more about how I want this all to work for me, and how I want to feel inside it.

In support of this goal, I am writing weekly updates on Fridays, for all of 2014. This is where I?ll share the story of all the ups and downs of bringing a big dream to life.

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Update TWENTY EIGHT.? I’ve been writing an update every week for twenty-eight weeks.? That’s kind of amazing.

This week I am struck by what is happening inside the Creative Dream Circle.? Huge shifts, deep healing, new openings: the kind of stuff that is really hard to talk about.? But I am so happy to have created this space where this stuff can happen.

Almost everyone has an idea in mind of what it would mean, to be fully engaged with their dream.? And it almost never turns out the way they thought it would.

Instead, they find something softer, richer, more beautiful.

I love that I have created this space for these miracles to happen.? And I love how CONSISTENTLY the miracles happen, as long as people show up for them.

I really believe in what I’m doing and I’m really appreciating how good it feels to have that congruence between my soul, my purpose and my work.

Onto the creative dream update questions:

What happened in the last week?

I’ve been writing a LOT.? I’ve been working on the Love your Life Creative Journal Class. Here I am working on the colouring book/guided journal part, in a cafe on across the street from my favourite park.

PLUS! I made a video for the Love your Life Creative Journal Class. which I am totally in love with, but how can you not be in love with something that is all about loving your wonderful life?

I’ve been drawing a LOT. (Note purple-stained thumb, you’ll see why in the next photo) I started a new journal of mandalas and am filling it up like crazy.

I dyed my hair purple.

(This is me against a purple pillow which matches my hair perfectly)

I’m still growing out my grey, but got tired of the faded-brown-dyed hair, which is just going to keep fading since I’m not colouring it anymore.? So I am having some fun with it while it grows out.? I didn’t colour my roots at all.? Brown/grey roots with purple hair is kind of cool!

This is from am older page in my journal that I flipped through and landed on this week.? Remembering how I felt then, and how I feel now was such a relief.? The work I’ve been doing for the Love your Life Creative Journal Class is really exactly what I need right now.

How do I feel about this?

I’m super happy, but something feels a little off.? Like I wish there was more to report in my update.

Sitting with that, I get: I want to be more structured.? Like I probably don’t need to be doing anything differently from how I’m doing it, but I’d like to be approaching my work in a more structured way.

Looking back to my Monday Morning Creative Genius Planning Session for this week, I see I had FREEDOM, EXPRESSION and DELIGHT working on my team.

I definitely had that.? And now when I look back on my week, a tiny inner critic is agitated about not working enough and not being organised enough and blah blah blah.

So, I take the little guy into the Un-Sticking Station and unravel everything until I get to the truth.

Healing the Inner Critic:

EVERY inner critic or fear or doubt holds a part of your truth, so if you just ignore it or fight with it you never get access to that piece of your soul.

That’s why I’m always using the Un-Sticking Station in the Creative Dream Circle.? It dissolves the parts that are not true and heals the wound so you can access the truth.? It’s all about healing the inner critic, fears and doubts that we all have so that we are more free to do what we want to do (this things are holding you back more than you think).

In this case, putting my inner critic into the Un-Sticking Stationg transformed it into a kitten who likes to nap in the sun.

The kitten needs to be cared for.? It does need structure and routine.? Not in a harsh “you have to do this exactly like THIS or else you fail” way, but in a supportive “let me take the best possible care of you because you are the sweetest thing ever and I loooooooooove you” way.

OK, I see what this needs.? A structure adjustment!

What do I need now?

To keep working with healing the inner critic.? And a structure adjustment!? But before I explore this more I want to find out what my dream needs…

What does my dream need now?

When I checked in with it, my dream reminded me that it needed to bounce and zoom this week.? Purple hair! Lots of bike rides! Drawing mandalas! Colouring! BRING IT!

It seems that my tiny inner critic is not that happy BUT my dream got what it needed.

My dream says that bouncing and zooming broke some STUFF loose.

My dream is sorry, but yes I have to deal with that STUFF – noticing old stories and ways of being that need to be healed and transformed.

Taking all this into account, my next mission is:

Deal with the STUFF that got knocked loose.? Work with these old stories and create some new ones.? Healing the inner critic.

Plus a structure adjustment.

OK, kind of in love with how this is working.

I actually AM working within a structure I just kind of forgot!? I made a schedule of classes for 2014.? These classes are what I wanted to bring to the Circle in 2014.

These specific classes hold the qualities of what I need on the path with this dream.? So I can trust this schedule as my structure.? Now, suddenly, all the playing and zooming and bouncing actually does fit in with the structure.? This is how I am working with the energies of the Love your Life Creative Journal Class? and how I’m getting set for the next classes I am creating, the SUPERHERO class and the MANDALA class and the MAGIC JOURNAL class.

This is how I am doing the ongoing work of healing the inner critic and the fear and the doubt that keep me from my dreams.? This is how I’m activating my superpowers and growing the Circle.

It’s all coming together so perfectly and sometimes I forget to trust that.

Writing this update felt like a huge healing.

PS: There is still ONE spot left in my small group coaching for teachers/healers/coaches/helper-people who want to help more people. Is it yours?? Get it here.

Last week I did a really lovely live video playdate as a part of 21 Secrets Live art journal class. It was a really lovely group, and I was sharing how I use my journal to work with my dreams, which led to a really lovely discussion of the obstacles to dreaming.

A lot of people attending were feeling conflicted about their dream. Like: I want this, but I also want that. And this and that are not compatible!

Feeling conflicted leaves people feel frustrated and powerless and never knowing what to be giving their energy and attention to.

The most universal example of this is women feeling like they need to choose between motherhood and career. Or choosing to have both and then always feeling like they’ve got too many things to juggle.

But feeling conflicted about what you REALLY want is super common and comes into play in a myriad of big and small ways every day.

• I want to have nachos for lunch but I like how I feel energized and nourished when I eat the kale salad.
• I long for a clean, minimalist space to work in my but art is just inherently messy, there are tools and supplies everywhere.
• I want to live in a tiny cabin in the woods but I’d miss my friends and fun city social life.
• I want to travel but I also want to create my dream home and can only afford to do one.

We are complex multi-dimensional beings. We have a lot of wants, needs and desires. It makes sense that they’re not always going to jive perfectly together.

Or does it?

It’s important to remember that all dreams come from the same place: your soul.

ALL dreams move you towards purpose, authenticity, joy, wholeness by bringing you into richer alignment with your soul.

And all of your dreams are connected to each other through that soul connection.

Since they’re all connected they CAN and DO jive perfectly together. On a soul level, your desires are singing this gorgeous symphony together – the symphony of your unique self.

But sometimes you need to expand your perspective in order to see and experience that.

No one EVER likes when I talk about this next part. But bear with me…

The teachings behind the popular Law of Attraction include many other spiritual laws. Laws which are nowhere near as fun as imagining that the universe is a giant vending machine, so they don’t get as much air time.

One of them is the Law of Sacrifice. See? Not fun at all.

You can do/be/have anything but you can’t do/be/have everything.

People hate this and so they go back to… well they go back to juggling, frustration and powerlessness.

Most people don’t spend enough time exploring sacrifice to find the magic in it. There is this immediate “oh hell no I’m not sacrificing anything” and an unwillingness to really look at this any deeper.? But sacrifice will actually get you somewhere, whereas juggling will not.

Underneath this pattern of feeling conflicted is a lack of clarity.

Sacrifice demands CLARITY. You can’t sacrifice something unless you are super clear on what is going on: why you are sacrificing what and how and for how long and what result you expect this to bring you.

This is true clarity about what you are bringing to life, in your life.

A lack of clarity is a sign that you’ve got some fears/doubts/inner-critics/limiting-beliefs/old patterns-which-no-longer-serves-you that are in need of your attention.

Clarity terrifies us because it demands that we deal with the exact thing we’re afraid to face. That’s why people would rather just stay in that place of “my dreams are conflicted, I’ll just stand here and juggle with them”.

But not you, you are committed to your dreams so you’re going to follow the Law of Sacrifice.

Which does not mean that a sacrifice is ALWAYS needed. The really cool thing is that being willing to look at your shit, and I mean REALLY look at your shit, often opens up new possibilities for how it can all jive together.

At the very least, it gets you in tune with the soul symphony of dreams you’ve got going on so you can see and appreciate how it all fits together and how that does not mean you necessarily get to have it all, right now. Because time and space are a bitch! But we have to work with them. It’s part of the deliciousness of being alive.

But there is always a way to get what you REALLY want.

Underneath the physical aspect of your dream is its essence: the heart and soul of your dream. You can always integrate the heart and soul of your dream into whatever is happening in your physical reality.

This is when your perception shifts and either new doors of possibility open up for you or you see a way that your conflicting dreams can nest together perfectly, with a few small shifts.

All the conflicts are happening on the surface level. You need to be working with your dream soul to soul. (here‘s a video on that)

So if you’re feeling conflicted, know that this doesn’t mean you have to keep juggling and being frustrated about feeling conflicted. It just means that working out your inner conflict is your next step on your path.

HINT: Often what needs to be sacrificed is an old way of thinking/being/seeing.

I teach this in detail in the Un-Sticking Station in the Creative Dream Circle. Using the superpowers of CREATIVITY and LOVE you can work out the conflict and get back to smooth sailing with your dreams.

Because often what you think you want often isn’t what you actually want.

Other people’s expectations and society’s unspoken rules can dance around in your head and make you think you want this when really you want that.

Plus, your own limiting beliefs will distort how well you can see your dream.

This can happen in a million different ways.? For example, if you have an un-healed inner child who is crying out for external approval, that part of you is going to twist your dream into something that will turn you into someone who gets loads of external approval.? Meanwhile, no matter how well you do with you YOU are not going to feel satisfied because your dream is all twisted up.

And having this inner conflict is OK!

Working through your conflict is the path to your dream, it clears space for you to know, unequivocally, what you want and how you want it.

I set a big goal for my business for 2014: to welcome 800 dreamers into my Creative Dream Circle. And to do this not by getting super pushy about selling – but to do this with heart and soul and creativity and joy and LOVE.(you can read my original post about this here)

At this point though, I’m not interested in the numbers. I’ve been more interested in exploring how to grow my capacity serve dreamers in bringing their dreams to life. And now I want to explore more about how I want this all to work for me, and how I want to feel inside it.

In support of this goal, I am writing weekly updates on Fridays, for all of 2014. This is where I’ll share the story of all the ups and downs of bringing a big dream to life.

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This week has been amazing.? It feels like summer is in full bloom, I’ve been having so much fun riding my bike and spending lots of time outside.? I was also ridiculously productive!? Yay week!

What happened in the last week?

Last week I shared:

I?d like to have a stream of MIRACULOUS PRODUCTIVITY happen so I can get my stuff done quick and make some time to explore a new idea that came to me this week, about doing some small group coaching program, working only with teachers/coaches/healers/helper-peoples to strengthen their superpowers and help them help more people.

And it happened! I put it out there!

I’m so thrilled with the response to this.? I wasn’t sure if I’d be able to go ahead with it, given how complicated it seems to get a group of international people together at the same time but I’ve (already!) got a fantastic small group of people coming together.? Plus we may be able to create a second group at a different time – most likely in the evening.

(So if you want to play but the times I listed don’t work – do get in touch with me!)

And this is more related to my goal with the Circle than I realised.

The more I get to know the essence (heart and soul) of the Circle and how it’s here to support people the more I learn about how the Circle wants to grow.? This is something it wants – having a small group doing more of a deep dive with weekly coaching benefits the whole – this creates a more solid foundation for the magic.

It’s like putting down deeper roots so the branches can sprout out taller.

Plus I’m getting the Love your Life Creative Journal Class ready.? I’m filling the playbook with mandalas to colour and juicy journaling prompts and healing energy processes.? I’m having so much fun with this!? (It starts June 12 in the Circle)

And I re-wrote the page for the Creative Dream Circle.? (I shared the process of writing the sales page here.)

I’m really thrilled with it.? It can be so awkward to know what I want to say to introduce people to the Circle, this version of the page feels the way I want it to feel, which I love.

Also: the weekly updates inside the Circle.

I am so in love with this!? Now that we’ve been doing this for a few weeks and people are starting to settle into the routine of it, the conversations and insights that are coming out of this are amazing.? It makes my heart so happy to see how the Circle members support and encourage each other.

Also, Circle members keep telling me how helpful it is to get these reminders to check in with their dream every week.? I am so glad that I started doing this.

And I often go back in to update my update which I find super helpful and super grounding as the process of learning more about what my dreams need is so non-linear it can be easy to get lost in it, or feel like I’m making less progress than I am.

How do I feel about this?

Really amazing.? My dream feels sturdy and strong.? All the work I’ve been doing recently on expanding capacity is really paying off.? Everything feels so much sturdier and capable of supporting more action.

A few weeks back I shared how my dream was a stream and there was this boulder which then turned into a smaller stone that I’ve been exploring for the past few weeks.? I learned some really cool things in exploring it (I’ve been sharing that mostly in the weekly updates that I post inside the circle, where I do go into more detail on the things I don’t want to share publicly) and then when I finished re-writing the sales page, the stone was gone.? Now the stream sparkles and flows.

What do I need now?

Self-care to stay strong to keep the flow flowing.

Daily bike rides.? Time in nature.? Quiet time for journaling.? Getting lots of sleep.? Being really present in the process of growing into who I am becoming as I grow my dream.? TRUSTING MYSELF TO HAVE THIS.

Space to settle into my newly stretched capacity inside my newly defined boundaries, of being able to hold space for more dreams to come to life.

What does my dream need now?

Right now, my dream is a bouncy ball!? It sparkles with delight.? It wants to ZOOM and BOUNCE.

Watching this sparkle ball ZOOM and BOUNCE in my imagination makes me very happy.? I have so much love for this dream.

I’ll keep exploring what this means, but what it feels like is that ZOOMING and BOUNCING are about being seen in new ways.? Moving into new spaces.? Attracting more attention.? It feels like promotion.? Not promoting the Circle, just promoting the Creative Dream Incubator website and letting people find their way to the magic.

What comes to mind is maybe advertising and some more work with SEO.? I have this one post that get 2,500 NEW people every month coming to it from Google. I’d like to have a few more posts like that.

Taking all this into account, my next mission is:

Keep preparing for the Love your Life Creative Journal Class.? Creating the most amazing classes for the Circle feeds the Circle.

Get the new small group coaching for teachers/healers/coaches/helper-people ready to go.

Explore the bouncing sparkle ball and find out how I can help it ZOOM and BOUNCE.