Get the calendar of upcoming calls here. | Get your next Dream Book lesson here.

What are you up to today? Let us know in the comments!

Tell us what you're working on, struggling with, ask questions, share your goals, etc, in these daily posts. This is a great way to put stuff "out there" where only people who "get it" are going to see it.

On Fridays I post my Dream Status Report which is a series of prompts I use every week to help me have more clarity, momentum and groundedness on my path. The prompts are here. You can do them with me, or do your own thing.

Get the calendar of upcoming calls here. | Get your next Dream Book lesson here.

Structure is changing everything!

Just to make this make more sense: I was a few days ahead in writing my updates, so I've had a few days to be with the things I learned about the structure I need.

On Monday I did a Creative Genius Planning Session and listed out all of the things I want to do this week. Somehow this practice had been feeling out of reach for some time, and I was trusting that it wasn't what I needed.

It felt amazing to set SMALL do-able goals for this week and to give myself that time to really think about what I want and need. I had been feeling really overwhelmed, but also I had stopped taking my peri-menopause supplements to see where I'm at without them, and without them I am foggy, overwhelmed, anxious and depressed.

I'm back on supplements, I have these goals written out and a really simple plan for how to work with them this week. It seems so small to write it out but it feels like everything.

It shifted how I show up, like moment to moment in the day. I'm checking in with myself more often, re-reading my goals for the week, remembering how I want to feel. I am getting things done, but then also stopping when I start to feel tired or overwhelmed, taking a small break, then getting back to it.

Last week I was doing a lot of distracting myself and so this week, to stay present with myself AND with my dreams, just feels like a miracle. I love how everything I've been working on - the dream work and inner work and outer work - is starting to come together and feel more cohesive.

I know it can't ALWAYS feel cohesive, I just love the times when it does.

Get the calendar of upcoming calls here. | Get your next Dream Book lesson here.

The big message from last week’s Dream Status Report is that I need more/better/right-fit STRUCTURE. I lost so much structure/routine in the pandemic, and then I rebuilt the best I could but it is definitely time to look at this more deeply.

So…

What structure do I need?

What structure do I have?

Why do I want structure?

How do I want my structures to help me feel?

This seems like enough questions to start, I am taking this to my Dream Book…

OK wow. The magic of writing things down!!!!

Turns out I did know a lot about what kinds of structure would be helpful, and putting this all together on one page feels amazing. I feel like YES I CAN DO THIS. I was feeling like I had NO structure and that’s not true, I do have the foundations, I just need a few extra things to give me the support I am looking for. AND I CAN MAKE IT FUN! I can can make it fit what I need Writing out what I want to get from this and how I want to feel was so helpful. I feel dialled in to my needs, and like OF COURSE I can figure this all out.

Get the calendar of upcoming calls here. | Get your next Dream Book lesson here.

I’ve had a few days to sit with my big un-sticking from last week.

I spent some time with my “art therapy journal” where I just paint, draw and write out my big feelings. I see now that I’ve been in resistance for the last few weeks, like not ALL THE WAY in it but in it. I’ve been allowing some feelings while avoiding others, and so some things were working in my creative process and some things were not.

The big feeling that surprised me was the grief about how split the new age/life coaching/wellness worlds became. I remembered that in 2019 I was writing about anti-racism and I honestly believed that if people could see the roots of white supremacy in these healing practices, that we would all work together to do better. I mean yes it was slow going, but I thought we were getting somewhere. Then the pandemic hit and so many went so far in the other direction. Especially in the local communities I was involved with, I don’t think I can ever participate in anything with them again.

That just hit me, again.

BUT THEN I was going out one day this weekend and my neighbour was outside so we got to talking about her new job. She is the Executive Director of a new kind of homeless shelter that is aiming to end homelessness, which is funded privately. She asked me to do journaling classes for the people there. So that’s a new way to be involved with people here that is more in alignment with my values.

Life keeps flowing!

And I know that making space for my feelings, all of the hard ones but also including my feelings about what I wish I was doing and my dreams for who I want to be, is the way through. Even when I am lost in all of the layers of feelings and don’t know which way is up.

Get the calendar of upcoming calls here. | Get your next Dream Book lesson here.

What are you up to today? Let us know in the comments!

Tell us what you're working on, struggling with, ask questions, share your goals, etc, in these daily posts. This is a great way to put stuff "out there" where only people who "get it" are going to see it.

On Fridays I post my Dream Status Report which is a series of prompts I use every week to help me have more clarity, momentum and groundedness on my path. The prompts are here. You can do them with me, or do your own thing.

Get the calendar of upcoming calls here. | Get your next Dream Book lesson here.

I started the day with a dumb argument with my partner. I was especially frustrated because I had such a great day planned, it’s finally warm enough in the early morning to make a coffee, ride my bike to the park and have coffee and journaling outside.

I’m trying to salvage my day and I get to the park and then I discovered that my favourite spot is not set up yet (they put all the tables and chairs away for winter) and it turns out that sitting anywhere else in the park doesn’t work for me! I felt too exposed anywhere else. The spot I like is under trees, along a wall that has a stairway on the other side going to a lower patio.

One of our members wrote to more recently and one of the things they said is how hard it is lately to get over disruptions to their routines.

I feel that so hard.

I couldn’t get into my morning journaling outside like I had been dreaming about. So I came inside the buildings (this park is an old rail yard, the big buildings are full of little shops and restaurants with a big open eating area and early in the morning there are quiet places I like).

It can feel SO HARD to get all the things in place to be able to focus on a dream. It's not just physically having the time, there are so many dimensions to this!

So I want to focus on feeling grateful that I have been able to work on it, at least in short bursts, five times a week, for quite a while now.

My practice today: meeting my dream which quickly turns into meeting my hurt feelings.

My hurt feelings were a tree in my heart raising tears. Drawing this out felt really satisfying, and my dream instantly appeared, as the knowing that my tears will nourish the soil.

I mean I don’t need to argue with my partner in order to nourish the soul, but since life happens, letting my feelings flow does nourish my dreams.

Get the calendar of upcoming calls here. | Get your next Dream Book lesson here.

My practice today: meeting my dream

The Field of Creative Dream Alchemy is so soothing. I really FEEL - I have everything I need to do what I want.

My dream shows up as a seed inside me that is ready to burst and grow. I had a great time drawing this out, but it's too early morning to take a photo to share.

I am out all day today which feels TOO BUSY but having this image of my dream inside me ready to burst and grow is really helping.

Get the calendar of upcoming calls here. | Get your next Dream Book lesson here.

Lots of distractions today.

I've been trying to out-run them in a sense. Putting invigorating aromatherapy in my diffuser, playing upbeat music, etc. But it's a rainy day and I tend to feel low energy and easily distracted on rainy days.

This has felt like "I'm too sensitive" and a bit of a failing but what if... I am a part of nature? What if rainy days ARE rest days? What if something is happening that I don't know about, and I don't participate in it as well as I could because I am trying to push myself to be somewhere I am not?

WHAT IF rainy days are nourishment days?

These are good questions.

I do want to do my practice though, I do want to meet my dreams and I am getting distracted from that, so I decided to start WITH the distractions.

Like - how are the distractions, or distractedness, showing up?

They are buzzing around me, but as I sit with that, and feel into it... they are projection of my fears and self doubt. But they're just tiny projections, not very powerful. I send love to the fear and doubt who are projecting.

My dream shows up as a rainbow shooting out of my heart/throat. I know it's about putting my work out there.

Back to the "it's a rainy day maybe I am a part of nature and this can impact me" questions...

I DO want to work on my project today! I don't want to lay out like a blade of grass being rained on all day. And I don't want to play dumb games on my phone in "low energy easily distracted mode".

BUT I can get COZY about how I work. I can let the quality of nourishment guide my day which means:

• make a pot of tea
• put on soft cozy clothes
• lay on the floor to draw pages for the book, don't focus on writing/editing today
• I would like to add "bake cookies" to this because that feels sooo cozy and emotionally nurturing, but after a few days of birthday treats actual nurturing would mean less sugar... I was going to make a mushroom lentil stew later in the week, maybe I will make that this evening. That feels nourishing.

Get the calendar of upcoming calls here. | Get your next Dream Book lesson here.

What are you up to today? Let us know in the comments!

Tell us what you're working on, struggling with, ask questions, share your goals, etc, in these daily posts. This is a great way to put stuff "out there" where only people who "get it" are going to see it.

On Fridays I post my Dream Status Report which is a series of prompts I use every week to help me have more clarity, momentum and groundedness on my path. The prompts are here. You can do them with me, or do your own thing.

Get the calendar of upcoming calls here. | Get your next Dream Book lesson here.

Weird day.

I lay down on the floor with the Dream Lab meditation met my dream and my feelings. My dream is a very vague little light in my heart. My feelings are annoying bees (I love bees! But these things were buzzing in an annoying way) buzzing around my head.

I know drawing this out would be good for me and I just didn't do it. I'm crabby and bees are buzzing around me.

I sat with this for a while and then decided to do a coaching session with myself:

I've got to get real with myself here. What is going on with me?

I am so overwhelmed because this book project is hard to hold.

I keep telling myself this but is that even true? How could it be so hard to hold when I want to do it so badly? When I do know what I am doing? When I do enjoy the process?

Let's find out.

In the field of Creative Dream Alchemy. I invite the soul of the book to join me.

The soul of the book is a book that opens up an a genie floats out of it. It says "OMG girl you've SO got this. This is not the problem." it takes my hand and encourages me to look out at the world "That's the problem."

"This is a hard world to live in, as a sensitive creative person who is doing what they can to contribute to creating a better world."

"You get overwhelmed from thinking that all of the self care you need to do in order to be the version of you who does the book is EXTRA and TOO MUCH. But this is actually the amount of self care needed. It's the right amount. And you need to make adjustments about your expectations for other things. Yes - you have less time, energy and mostly MENTAL CAPACITY for other things, so be more committed to pulling back."

So interesting. I was thinking of getting better/more adaptogenic mushroom supplements to help with my mental capacity but now I feel like I need to exercise, eat well and get enough sleep, which I am doing, (but exercise should be increased because this is the thing that helps most with my mental health and I've been cutting back on bike rides for various reasons and that needs to stop) and then look at where I can lower expectations for what I do in a day.

OK this feels a little better. I am going to let this sit and see where it leads.

Get the calendar of upcoming calls here. | Get your next Dream Book lesson here.

Anxiety is in full swing now.

I'm doing all the things to soothe myself and still - here I am.

I was getting dressed for my morning bike ride and it got really bad - like, please don't make me leave. So I stayed home. I don't have to understand why I feel so anxious, I keep reminding myself.

I'm so glad yesterday I got the idea to draw out a dream meeting and a feelings meeting. This feels like a good place to start.

I lay down on the floor with the Dream Lab meditation and get into the Field of Creative Dream Alchemy and then just stay there for a bit. Soaking up the sensation of feeling more connected to myself and my inner gifts.

When I invite my dream in, I am looking for it above me but I can't find it but also I feel like it IS here, I just don't see it, so I look around me and there it is, below me. It's grass. Soft and supportive and sparkling. I am laying in it and it's holding me and it's fine for me to feel however I feel, it's still here and it's magic is supporting me.

I invite in my feelings and they show up as spikes like a stegosaurus' back, but on my front and mostly my chest.

The spikes don't want anything but to be allowed to be there.

And somehow it feels good to allow my feelings AND know I am supported by my dream. I stay with this a while and it's like my brain re-arranges itself.

Like OF COURSE I am too sensitive for the world some days, I am creating something new. OF COURSE I get anxious when I spend too much time out in the world and OF COURSE what is "too much" changes all the time. These aren't "weird anxiety symptoms" these are natural response to being a sensitive creative person living in this world.

Now I feel really inspired to work on my book. The anxiety is still here, but doesn't feel like it's "in the way" it's just a part of things now.

Drawing this out felt amazing!!!

Yesterday when I had this idea, I imagined that I would do the dream meeting on one page and the feelings meeting on the other page, like they were operate. But the way it happened they were definitely one thing. And putting it together like this feels so good.

Get the calendar of upcoming calls here. | Get your next Dream Book lesson here.

I am starting to feel anxious.

I thought anxiety was new for me, from the pandemic and peri-menopause, but as I live with it longer, I remember that I was "a nervous kid" and actually I was experiencing anxiety but no one knew how to identify it or help it.

I share this to say - these practices help me work through stuff, so it doesn't make sense to stop them when they get hard.

They won't "work" the same way, but they are invaluable. And the times when the practice feels super messy and like I'm definitely doing it wrong - those are the times when it's the most important to keep showing up.

And I want to be an example of that here.

As spring is finally springing and I am going out into the world more, I am getting overwhelmed which is triggering anxiety.

Some days it makes me feel overwhelmed by the thought of my dreams. But I want to sit with that overwhelm, and also sit with the soul of my dreams, to give myself space to process.

I want to remember that my dream is not a to-do list or pressure to accomplish! It's an invitation to growth and healing and becoming more who I want to be.

What I WANT this to look like:

Meeting my dream and drawing the meeting AND ALSO meeting my feelings and drawing that meeting too.

I don't feel ready to start this today but I do want to set the intention to start tomorrow.

Today my practice is sitting in front of my big window and watching the birds. Yesterday Joseph put out 2 kinds of birdseed so we've had more birds out here for our cat to watch, but I like to watch them too. This is so soothing.

Get the calendar of upcoming calls here. | Get your next Dream Book lesson here.

What are you up to today? Let us know in the comments!

Tell us what you're working on, struggling with, ask questions, share your goals, etc, in these daily posts. This is a great way to put stuff "out there" where only people who "get it" are going to see it.

On Fridays I post my Dream Status Report which is a series of prompts I use every week to help me have more clarity, momentum and groundedness on my path. The prompts are here. You can do them with me, or do your own thing.

Get the calendar of upcoming calls here. | Get your next Dream Book lesson here.

What I WANT my practice to be today: Meeting my dream and drawing the meeting.

But I am not feeling it, so I am following the principles of Creative Dream Alchemy and working with what is here.

For some context: I did updates over the weekend to get ahead a few days, as my husband and I are going away for our anniversary this week - just 2 days, 1 night. To a really lovely island that will be quiet this time of year, at a hotel with huge, indoor and outdoor, warm and hot mineral pools which we intend to spend a lot of time in.

So it's Monday morning and I went to a coffee shop for my usual morning routine, dream work, etc while Joseph sleeps in a little and then we are on our way.

Except I am so annoyed with him!

And I don't want to be!

And when I try to "put that aside" and do my Dream Work, I just can't.

And I could skip this whole thing, and just write this update when I get back, but THIS IS A PART OF IT, showing up for a practice even when you're annoyed with someone you love or something else is happening that makes it hard to focus.

Which is why "meeting yourself where you are" is such a huge part of Creative Dream Alchemy.

Otherwise it's like all of the magic and healing of my dream are only accessible when I'm in a good place. And I don't want that for me, or anyone else.

And I know there is magic here too.

There is so much I could say about the ways I get annoyed with Joseph and don't want to be. Being in any relationship is complicated and being in an interracial relationship adds another layer of complexity. But we have an excellent couples therapist who does understand the impacts of colonialism and racism and we've found ways to be supportive of each other and give each other space for our radically different lives.

Ha. Just writing this out, like explaining to you where it's all coming from, has eased my annoyance.

I always WANT TO be compassionate for where he's coming from, be understanding that he is doing his best and he's facing obstacles that I don't face. And some days I can't access it.

Yeah, just writing about my feelings has soothed them. Funny how that works, lol. MAKING SPACE for them is healing.

My feelings are totally valid and his feelings are totally valid too. When I think about the thing I am annoyed about, I see how I was trying to get him to do what I wanted, to soothe my feelings. And thinking "But I do things to soothe your feelings all the time why can't you do this for me?" but it doesn't work like that. And I was asking him when his tank was empty.

So where am I now:

Now that I have made space for my feelings, and written out a few things, the annoyance is gone. My body feels calm. I feel ready to start out fun mini-vacation together. This feels good.